You Always Come Back to Me
by Saiesaie
Summary: Three years ago Matilda was taken to France to live with her older brother Scott and his family. Leaving her friends and her boyfriend behind was the hardest thing she ever had to do. Now she’s back in the Bay what will happen? RicMattie & others FINISHED
1. Chapter 1 Sweet Home Summer Bay

"Home Sweet Home," I muttered sarcastically as we drove passed the familiar sign reading 'Welcome to Summer Bay'.

"Oh come on, Mattie. You know how much you grew to love this place before. We physically had to drag you away from it when you came to live with us," Scott spoke softly, knowing all too well how badly I reacted to his decision to apply for full custody of me, bringing me to live in France with him.

"Yeah well things change!" I snapped. "Now I'd die happy if I never saw this place again in my life," I said a little quieter this time, knowing that this was not completely true.

_**Three Years Earlier…**_

"_She's gone Tony, we'll never see her again!" I sobbed into Tony's shoulder. "Why her? Why us? People always say everything happens for a reason, I'd just like to know what the reasoning behind **this** was!" I screamed, not even thinking about how I may have just deafened my stepfather._

"_I know Tilly, I know…" Tony's words were barely a whisper. He drew circles on my back with his hand, soothing me slightly._

_Kit sat there in shock, no tears, no change in expression… nothing. I could hear gasps from outside my sister's hospital room. Rachel had obviously told everyone what had happened. How my mum had been taken from me forever… how the mistakes of a truck driver had taken her life._

-x-

The memories from that day still stay surprisingly clear in my mind. The shocked faces, the silent tears, the not-so-silent tears and the grief that hung over our heads, like a big black cloud raining down on us.

I was a wreck. Pushing everyone away and shutting myself out was my way of dealing with the death of my mother.

Only, one person never gave up though, never let me close the door on our relationship and led me through, what seemed at the beginning, to be a never-ending tunnel of grief.

I was in love, completely in love with my best friend, my boyfriend, my Ric…

-x-

"_Mattie wait! You can't keep running away from me. You can't run away from everything that scares you" With that last comment I stopped running down the beach and spun around to be met with his face._

"_You think I'm scared, Ric?" I snapped. "You really think that's why I've been acting like this?" I decided to continue my rant, not aware of the hurt in his eyes. "My mum was killed, Ric, **killed!** How would you react if the one person in the world that you relied on and trusted the most was ripped out of your life so suddenly, so unexpectedly!" I was screaming by that stage, letting the bottled up feelings from the previous weeks flow out. Tears streamed down my face but I was too caught up in the moment to think about wiping them away. "I'll never get to tell her that I love her again, Ric. Never…" and with that last word my voice broke and Ric's strong and protective arms wrapped around my small frame, supporting my weight as my legs gave in._

"_It's alright, it's alright, I'm here," he whispered his soothing words softly in my ear. Stroking my hair and wiping away the continual flow of tears, we sat there, on the beach in silence. Listening to the crashing of the waves on the shore._

_I leant my head on Ric's chest, listening to the beating of his heart. I felt safe in his arms; it was almost like a bubble formed around me. Protecting me from the tragedies that seemed to happen around me, and the pain I felt._

-x-

After that night, I learned to deal with my grief. There was no doubt about it, everything was still so painful, it was just easier and I knew it was down to Ric. The funeral in Adelaide, the Memorial Service and the departure of Kit, my sister with Kim and my baby nephew, Archie, he was there every step of the way.

Eventually, I became happy again. I felt less guilty when I smiled and laughed. After many weeks of crying and moping around things went back to normal. The 'Fantastic Four' were back together again – Cassie, Lucas, Ric and I.

Little did I know that the hurt I had been feeling before, would return one night when I got home, in the form of a phone call from my brother, Scott.

-x-

**A/N: Well that's the first chapter guys! Hope you liked it. I'm kind of new to this whole fan fiction thing so any tips would be extremely appreciated. Please review!!**


	2. Chapter 2 The Phone Call

"Everything looks exactly as it did when we left, doesn't it Scott?" Hayley's voice came from the seat beside Scott in the front of the car.

I looked over at Noah; he was the spitting image of Scott at his age, well from the photos I had seen of Scott at his age. At four years old, he hadn't had to cope with the challenges that had come his family's way. His bright blue eyes stared back at me, and a cheesy grin spread across his lips. As much as I wanted to blame him, I couldn't. It wasn't Noah's fault that his parents had decided to move back to Summer Bay, he was still blissfully unaware of the going-ons that had happened in this town.

_**Three Years Earlier…**_

"_See you guys!" I waved goodbye to Cassie and gave my boyfriend a kiss goodnight._

"_I'll text you in the morning, okay? We can meet up and do something," Ric said._

"_Sure. Goodnight!" I said cheerily. Unable to resist, I gave him one last kiss before seeing Lucas shut the door to separate us. I retaliated very immaturely by sticking my tongue out at him. He laughed at me and began walking off to his bedroom. I walked into the lounge to find Tony sitting on the couch, on the phone._

"_Oh hey, Mattie. It's Scott on the phone for you," he said while handing the phone over to me. Something wasn't right. I could feel it. I brought the phone up to my ear and braced myself for what was coming._

"_Hi Tilly. How's it going?" Scott said down the line. _

"_I'm great, Scott. How are you? I replied, not letting on that I knew he needed to tell me something important. He sounded different, almost worried._

"_I'm doing fine thanks, Mattie. Listen, there's something I need to talk to you about…." I felt myself tense up and I glanced at my knuckles, which were going white from the tight fist I was making. "… you see, I've been holding off on this for a couple of weeks now, letting you get your head around everything that happened with mum and I think now is a good time to tell you."_

"_Tell me what Scott?" My voice was full of concern and anxiety._

"_Well… since your still only sixteen, someone needs to take care of you. I don't want to burden Tony so, together Hayley and I decided to apply for full custody of you… and we got it! You're finally going to get to come to France, isn't that great?"_

_I didn't reply, I couldn't reply. In those few seconds my world came crashing down around me. I could feel the blood draining from my face, my legs threatening to give in below me. Instantly, I could taste the salty tears on my lips and I dropped the phone, losing all control of my body._

_The next few moments were a blur. Tony picked up the phone and Scott obviously repeated what he had just said to me as I saw Tony go the same shade of pale as I had minutes before. He looked like I felt. Distraught._

_Lucas walked into the room, wondering what the noise was. He was met with silence._

_So many thoughts were rushing through my mind. How could I leave? I was just getting back to normal again. What would Cassie say? How would I find the strength to tell the man I loved that I was leaving for the other side of the world?_

-x-

"You ready to surprise Tony, Matilda?" Scott's voice brought me back to Earth. We hadn't told anyone that I was coming back to the Bay. To be honest I had basically been forced to come back in the first place.

When I first moved to France, the phone calls to Tony were frequent, almost daily. Yes, it cost us both a fortune but we didn't care. Then, slowly but surely the phone calls became less often until they may as well have stopped altogether. I also kept in contact with all of my friends, Cassie, Luc, Martha, Belle, Drew and even Sally. There were emails, postcards and letters, but like Tony and I, we all drifted apart. The one person I still felt close to was Jack. He never gave up on me even though everyone else had. In fact we were closer than ever. He was just like a brother and I'm sure if mum was still alive, he would be by now.

Henry stayed in France, after being taken out of boarding school; just as I was taken out of Summer Bay, he settled in well. He was offered a scholarship in Paris, solely for his tap dancing. I'm proud of him, even if I am a little jealous that he has managed to do something with his life.

"I can't wait to see everyone again," Hayley excitedly said. "Especially Irene! How surprised is she gonna be to see me!"

"I know. I can't wait to catch up with the guys, it's been four years!" Scott replied, he too was getting excited.

Whereas I was dreading the fact that I had to see everyone again. My time in France changed me, changed my perspective on life. What if they hated me for not keeping in touch? Were my friends even still in Summer Bay? Or, more importantly, was **he** still here?

-x-

**A/N: That's the second chapter then guys! Thanks a million to Just A Little Bit Dramatic (Bella) & Matty and Luke Forever! You made my day with your kind reviews and made me want to write this chapter straight away. Just to tell you guys, the next chapters will definitely not all be up this frequently! LOL!**


	3. Chapter 3 Telling Him & Saying Goodbye

I undid the seat belt that had been digging into my skin since I first strapped it on at the airport. Scott had already opened his car door and Hayley was lifting Noah out from his car seat. Scott was whistling and Hayley had a massive grin on her face. They were thrilled to be back in the Bay. Just as I wished I was...

_Three Years Earlier…_

"_Ric please say something, anything! I'm sorry I couldn't tell you earlier, you have absolutely no idea how hard this is for me Ric!" I shouted, annoyed at the silence I was met with. Yes, I did realise how hard this may be for him too, although he could at least give me some reply anyway._

_I had met him on the beach, our favourite spot. The place where Ric had first met me, as 'Dalby' the bully. I had snuck out every night to meet him after that, not telling a soul. The spot where he told me what his dad did to him when they were alone, he had opened up to me and for that I am eternally grateful. The place where he first told me that he felt more than friendship towards me, before I ran away, shocked by his sudden speech. The spot where he had comforted me after my mum's death and after the departure of Kit, with Kim and my gorgeous nephew Archie. And now, the place where I would break both of our hearts._

_Thankfully, the darkness of the night hid his face from complete view. Ric was always a man to cover up what he was feeling, keep his emotions to himself, although his eyes gave the game away. Those beautiful, deep blue eyes. I could lose myself in a flash in his eyes, forget about the world around me._

_He turned to face me, his face now visible in the moonlight. The tears that fell from his eyes glistened in the bright light and his eyes bore nothing but hurt and pain._

"_Ric, believe me, I do not know how I will ever be able to live without you. You're my life support, my oxygen, I love you." I started sobbing uncontrollably, collapsing in the sand._

_He still remained quiet. His arms reached out to me and pulled me into his chest. His scent, his body around me, it comforted me and brought me peace for a while._

_We cried ourselves to sleep on the sand that night, we only left each other when our parents came to find us, oblivious to the fact of how in love we really were._

-x-

I walked out of the car, Scott gave me a knowing look while he struggled with the wriggling Noah in his arms. A look that said 'Mattie, please just do this for me.'

I walked to the front door, up the familiar steps, that I had fallen down countless times. I lifted my hand slowly but surely and gave three taps on the wooden door. I prayed that no one would be in but it was obvious there was, lights shone through the lounge window, possibly from the T.V..

The door handle was pushed down and as I stepped back the door was pulled inwards...

-x-

"_Guys, I just want to tell you," I paused gulping down the lump that formed in the back of my throat, "that this isn't goodbye, it's just see you soon! I promise."_

_I stood before everyone in Summer Bay, the friends that I had grown up with and learned to love. The feeling I found in my heart every time I thought of leaving them was indescribable, but there I was. I said my final goodbyes, hugging and kissing everyone, my eyes were anything but dry._

_The taxi sped around the corner, ready to pick me up. I got through the emotional speech from Tony, and the loving speech from Jack. _

_His eyes were on me, I could feel them; he was sitting on the bench across the road. The same look glazed over his eyes that I had seen so much in the last few days._

_I walked over to him, briskly. Trying not to show how upset I really was._

_The overwhelming silence that I seemed to be overcome by often when I was around him after that night, came again._

"_Hey," he spoke softly as I sat down beside him._

"_I've gotta be heading off soon…"_

_He nodded. " I know."_

_He always did that. Stayed quiet when he couldn't describe the way he was feeling. It had begun to irritate me, not that I'd ever tell him that._

"_Ric I meant what I said up there, this really isn't goodbye, I am coming back, and you know that don't you?" He continued to stare out to the shiny sea before us._

"_You'll never forget me will you, Mattie? I love you so much; I don't think I'll ever stop wishing that you were by my side."_

"_How could I forget you, Eric Dalby? You're the love of my life. I love you more than words could ever say," I sobbed before looking at the ground. He cupped his hand under my chin and lifted my face up so I looked into his eyes. Our lips then met in what we knew was the last kiss. It was filled with love and affection. I couldn't bear to let go, but I had to._

_I pulled away at the sounding of the taxi's horn. I gave him one last smile and turned away walking towards the taxi. Towards my future…_

-x-

**A/N: Chapter Three's finished! I did have the other chapter writen as well, but due to the heap of junk that's called 'my computer' I lost it. It may be up tomorrow but i don't know as I have my friend's birthday party tonight and I'm staying over, i'll try my best though. As always, thank you for the many kind reviews, they make me smile :)**


	4. Chapter 4 Welcome Home

"TILLY!" Tony screeched. He pulled me into the biggest hug causing my feet to leave the ground. I hugged him back with all my might. I'd missed him so much, that I was sure of. His hair was shorter and overall, he looked much healthier than when I had last seen him. Three years ago, after mum's death he stopped eating properly and exercising regularly like he did before causing him to look extremely run down. Now, he looked healthy and happy, he was almost glowing in fact.

"Scott, Hayley, Noah!" he shouted again, letting me down as he spotted the other guests that stood behind me. Scott had decided to keep the fact that we were moving back to Summer Bay a secret from everyone, just for the fun of it! So this surprised Tony a lot.

"Mattie?" I whirled around, to identify the voice behind me.

"Luc!" I ran into his arms, letting him catch me as his dad had done moments before. Lucas had changed much more than Tony. He had grown up. His small and almost scrawny body had changed into a muscular and broad one, and he too seemed much happier.

-x-

We all became reacquainted, sharing stories and gossip, and generally learning about each other all over again. We sat on the same sofa that had been in the lounge when I had left. The room was mostly the same. Well, maybe it didn't have the feminine touch it used to have about it, but apart from that, it was like I had never left.

Pictures still stood tall on the mantelpiece. The one that caught my eye was the beautiful one of mum that we had put up after her memorial service. It was like she was looking around the room, watching over us still. There were also photos of Jack and Martha, with a small photo of their new baby daughter beside them. Christina was her name and Jack had kept me up to date with her progress through his letters and phone calls.

-x-

"I can't wait to take you down to the Surf Club, Mattie," Lucas said as we were washing up in the kitchen, watching Noah play with his toys in the next room. "Cassie is going to be so psyched!"

I laughed nervously. "Yeah, but if you don't mind… I'd like to go and see Jack first. Is he down at the station?"

"Yeah," Tony answered as he walked in the room. "We can take you there now if you like, and Jack can take you to Noah's after you've had a catch up."

"That would be great, thanks Tony." I walked past him and gave him a kiss on the cheek.

-x-

**A/N: Yes I know it's short but there is good reasoning behind that!! My cousin had a baby boy yesterday so I've been visiting her at the hospital. Also, I just read the most depressing spoilers ever for Home & Away in the next couple of weeks! And they're the official spoilers!! So I needed to write a chapter to cheer me up. I just hope they turn out to be making things look different to what they really are. I won't mention what the spoiler was so I don't ruin it for people. But seriously :(**


	5. Chapter 5 Constable Holden

I walked into Yabbie Creek Police Station. I was really excited about seeing Jack. Scott, Hayley and Noah had gone to the house they had bought recently. They jumped at the chance to move back to Summer Bay when Jack had phoned me and told us about the beautiful house.

I walked up to the desk, unable to see Jack in the station.

"Hello, I'm looking for Jack Holden, is he here just now?" I asked a young woman of about my age who was sitting at the desk. Her black curls sat nicely on her shoulders and shaped her face nicely. She looked really friendly and cheery.

"Sorry, he has just been called out to a disturbance down the road, is there anything I can help you with?" she spoke softly yet confidently. I just seemed to warm to her instantly.

"No it's okay, I'm his sister and I'm just recently back in Summer Bay to surprise him. Do you mind if I wait here?" I asked, just hoping she would agree.

"Of course you can, that's not a problem. He should only be a few minutes," she gave me one final smile before walking away to answer the ringing phone.

Sure enough, ten minutes after I had taken a seat in the rather uncomfortable chairs at the station, Jack walked in, looking quite pleased with himself. He had obviously just arrested the two men that stood at the desk waiting to be charged.

"Good afternoon, Constable Holden. Good day so far?" I said, loud enough so he could hear me clearly. I saw him whip his head round, not completely sure it was my voice he was hearing. I flashed the biggest grin that had come across my face in weeks and ran up to hug him.

"Oh my god! Mattie! You're here… in the Bay… why?" he questioned while I gave him the biggest hug with all the strength I could muster.

"We're moving back. I'm staying in Summer Bay!" I screamed, drawing the attention of a few strangers in the room. The female officer at the desk looked at me again. It was like she was analysing me. Possibly trying to remember me. I ignored the look from her and gave all my concentration to Jack who just happened to be finishing his shift.

"Come on then what are you waiting for?" he nudged me. "Let's head to Noah's, I can't wait to tell everyone your back!"

I replied with a nervous laugh. Was I really ready to face them? I guess I had to be…

-x-

Jack's Ute pulled up in the car park for the Surf Club. The music from inside gently played in the background. My palms were sweating; my breaths short and my hands were shaking. I had never suffered with my nerves before now, but I guess there's a first time for everything.

Jack walked in front of me as we became closer to the entrance. He pulled the door open and I was met with the sight of that oh-so-familiar pool table. I had won many games on that pool table. Most of them to Lucas and Ric. They had never heard of a girl that played pool, they thought it was ridiculous, how wrong they were…

"Wait here, okay? I'll just be a sec," Jack told me. I waited behind the wall, knowing full well what Jack was about to do.

"Everyone! Oi guys!" he shouted, "Everyone, I've got a surprise with me tonight…" he signalled for me to come through and join him and I did.

"Hi everyone," I said shyly, waiting for a reaction.

"Mattie!" Cassie screamed and hugged me.

"Hey Cass!" I broke free from the hug, "you have no idea how much I've missed you."

"Oh I think I do," she said while pulling me in for another hug. That's when I caught sight of something on her left hand, something shiny.

A ring with a sparkling diamond on top was sitting on her wedding finger.

"Oh My God!!!" I screamed. "Cassie! You're engaged!"

"Yep, did Lucas not tell you?"

"Lucas!" I was in complete shock. My two best friends engaged. Talk about partner swapping. "I'm gonna be your sister!"

"I know! And now you're here to help me plan the wedding!" she started jumping around.

"Matilda," Sally and Brad said in unison. "It's great to see you."

"Hiya you guys," I paused to examine them, "is that a wedding ring I see on your finger, Sal?"

"It sure is, it's our first anniversary in two weeks."

"Aww congratulations guys. I'm just so sorry I missed it."

"You didn't know Mattie. Don't worry about." Brad said.

-x-

The night was going well. Everyone in the Surf Club was slightly tipsy. I'd spent my last forty-five minutes talking to Colleen and catching up on the gossip. I'd flown around the room catching up with everyone. I couldn't believe how little they had changed. A few different hairstyles here, a couple more wrinkles there and that was it!

I caught a glimpse of Alf Stewart across the room. I decided to go over and see him it was now or never.

"Hi Mr Stewart!" I said cheerily.

"Young Matilda! I heard you were back in the Bay. How are you, love?"

"I'm great thanks. I'm so glad to be back. Nobody seems to have changed."

"Well that's Summer Bay for you, love." He said while looking around the room.

"I'll catch up with you later then, Mr Stewart!" I said while being dragged away by Cassie.

"Sure. Take care, love!"

-x-

"Cassie, where are you dragging me off to now?" I questioned while laughing. The alcohol had gone straight to my head. The last time I was here, it wasn't legal for me to drink. I was sixteen. And now at nineteen years old, I was in the Surf Club, drunk.

"This is Tessa," Cassie slurred. Blatantly drunk. "She's a trainee officer for the police," she managed to get out. I laughed at Cassie's severe intoxication and smiled at Tessa, the girl I had met at the station earlier.

"Hey, I'm Matilda but most people call me Mattie."

"Tessa," she replied as she stuck out her hand for me to shake it. I was being really nice to her but I couldn't help sense some hostility on her part. "I don't mean to be rude, but do I recognise you from somewhere? I'm sure I've seen you before," she asked obviously trying to think where I was from.

"Nope not unless you've lived in France sometime in the last three years," I laughed.

"Oh no, I've not," she laughed along with me. The recent hostility disappearing.

-x-

I spent the rest of the night talking with Jack, Martha, Cassie, Lucas and Tessa as well as singing karaoke and becoming more and more drunk.

"I can't wait for you to meet my boyfriend, Mattie," she said to me quietly while Jack and Martha were heading off to get back to their newborn baby, Christina.

"Oh wow. You never mentioned a boyfriend. Is he from around here? I may have known him before I left," I asked.

"Yeah, you probably have met him actually. He seems to have been here for a while."

"Well great, I'd love to meet him. Do you think he'll pop along tonight?" I asked getting quite curious about who her boyfriend was.

"Yeah he had a mate's party from work to go to first then he said he'd come meet me for a drink here."

"Cool can't wait."

-x-

**A/N: Fifth chapter is finished guys! I'm really getting into this fic now and I've just had a great idea for a plot. Don't worry a reunion will be happening very soon! If anyone is wondering about the spoiler I mentioned last time, check on BTTB in the spoiler section in the forums. It's week 21. I also just found out that that's the week that I'm on holiday with the school in London!! So I'm going to have to wait an extra week to see Home & Away that week :( Thanks for all the kind reviews. They really keep me motivated. Please keep them coming!**


	6. Chapter 6 Meet the Boyfriend

"Mattie!" Tessa flagged me over. "He's here!"

I walked over to the bar where she was standing. I stood at the bar waiting for her to come back from the door where she was obviously greeting him, when I dropped my bag. I bent down to the floor to pick it up.

"Mattie, this is my boyfriend."

I heaved myself up from the ground where I was picking my bag up and turned around to see a man's shirt. I raised my head a little to have a good look at him. If his chest was anything to go by, he was definitely going to be a very handsome guy.

I was met with an extremely familiar face and my jaw dropped. He mirrored this action and we both stood like this for what seemed like hours but was only a few seconds.

"Mattie, Ric? Do you two know each other?" She was met with silence. Neither of us spoke. We were both in total shock. Seeing his face again after three years brought so many feelings and memories flooding back. I found myself getting lost in those eyes of his. And studying his face.

"Erm… hey." I cursed myself for being so simple. 'Hey' that's the best I could come up with?

"Hi," his voice was coarse and croaky.

"Well I gotta go, I said I'd pop round to Martha and Jack's to see my new niece." I ran out of that door quicker than I'd ever thought possible. Did that really happen? Was Ric in there with a girl I had instantly become friends with?

-x-

I knocked on the door violently. Martha and Jack were living in the old Bachelor Pad. Where they were living before they broke up before. They had been going strong for three years now. They got back together three weeks after I left and I was so pleased for them. Now they have a beautiful baby girl, Christina who is two and a half months old. I've seen photos. She has her mother's beauty and her father's eyes, a perfect combination. She's definitely going to break a few hearts when she's older. Well, that's if Jack lets any men near her in the first place.

"Whoa Mattie. Calm down. What's up?" Jack asked as he answered the door.

"Sorry, I didn't interrupt anything, did I?" I instantly regretted being so loud. They had a new baby after all.

"No, no, it's fine. We're just about to put Tina to sleep actually. You wanna come in and see her? She's been dying to meet her Auntie Matilda."

"Sure. Why not? I've been dying to meet her to!"

**A/N: Sorry it's another short chapter I'm quite busy just now. How's the story going? Do you like it? Please keep reviewing, I love reading every one of them and it really makes me want to write more. I'm just giving you some notice that I am going away with my school to London for a week on the 4th June, so don't expect me to be able to update then :) LOL. Please keep reading. the plot is just starting to unfold. **


	7. Chapter 7 Avoiding Your Past

"Oh my goodness, Martha! She's absolutely gorgeous!" I smiled down at baby Christina, while Martha sat beside me on the sofa, her too admiring her baby girl.

"Isn't she just," Martha replied. "I was so scared when I first found out I was pregnant. Jack and I hadn't planned on having a family so soon, although we have been married for four years now…" Another sudden knocking at the door interrupted Martha.

"We're popular tonight," Jack joked as he walked out of the kitchen to answer the door. I cooed at Christina who was resting peacefully in my arms. I decided to wait until Martha and I were alone before I brought up the subject of Ric.

_**Three Years Earlier…**_

"_Scott! The mail's here!" Hayley sung from the front door upstairs to Scott, who was lazily reading the paper in the lounge._

"_Hayley! Let me see!" I shouted as I came trampling down the stairs, excitement and hope shown all over my face._

"_Sorry Tilly, there's still nothing. He'll write soon though, I'm sure," Hayley tried to comfort me but I couldn't help the tears welling up in my eyes. He had promised to keep in contact, even if we couldn't be in a relationship. Ric had promised me that he would write to me. I never got one letter, ever…_

-x-

"Yeah sure. She's in here," I heard Jack say to the person at the door. I turned round towards the footsteps that became closer behind me, to see Ric.

"Matilda? Can we talk?" he asked shyly. I replied with a glare. If he thought I was going to forget everything that he had done, or rather **hadn't **done, then he had another thing coming. "Please?"

He knew I couldn't resist those puppy dog eyes. I didn't have the strength to fight them. "Fine," I agreed. Reluctantly passing Christina back to her mum. "Goodbye sweetie, I'll see you soon, okay?" I said, kissing her lightly on the top of her head. "Let's go," I directed my eyes to Ric and grabbed my coat at the door. "Thanks for letting me see her guys. You do know you won't be able to get rid of me now, right?" I laughed, giving Jack a kiss on the cheek.

"I wouldn't expect anything less, Mattie," Jack replied waving goodbye. I walked out of the door, completely aware of Ric's eyes on me. Giving one last wave Jack shut the door behind us and we were alone. Just Ric and I… This was going to be a long night…

-x-

"So…" he said uncomfortably. We were down the beach, at the spot where I would once call 'our spot'.

"Yeah?" I questioned, folding my arms across my chest, showing how un-amused I was. The ocean breeze blew my hair to the side and pushed the material of my dress against my clammy skin. Ric's shirt flew around him in the wind and showed off his bare stomach, as much as I tried not to notice it, I couldn't tear my eyes away.

"You're looking good," he made an attempt to start the conversation.

"Thanks, you're not looking too shabby yourself," I replied, keeping the conversation light and away from the hurt and pain I knew we had both felt over the past couple of years.

"How familiar is the place, huh?" he laughed. I also let out a small smile, thanking him for breaking the ice.

"Yeah, I've got so many memories here." I turned away to look at the sea, the way it crashed against the sand, washing away again.

"I've missed you!" he blurted out. I turned my head around sharply and looked at him, partly stunned at what he had said and partly angry for him turning the conversation to a point I definitely was not comfortable with.

"Me too," was all I managed to get out and even that was whisper. I composed myself and didn't let the watery eyes I now had, affect me. "So, what did you want to talk to me about?" I asked, realising that there probably wasn't a point to this meeting at all.

"I just needed to see you and, well you know…" he said, sighing and rubbing his neck like he always did when he was stressed and feeling uneasy. "…explain about Tessa."

"Ric, you do not need to 'explain' to me about your girlfriend. Yes, we maybe have a past but that doesn't mean you need to tell about your love life now. We finished a long time ago. We're both different people now." The words I spoke stung me just as much as they did him.

"Yeah you're probably right."

"So, I've been hearing all of the latest town gossip. So much has happened since I've lived here."

"Yeah, you're not wrong there. Then again, it has been three years. Not everything can stay the same." Ric said.

"No it can't…."

-x-

**A/N: Another short one! Sorry but it is just much easier to write in little snippets with the amount of stuff I have going on at the moment. It's my last week in the year that I'm in at school which has eased the work load but I've still got tons of other stuff going on. Thank you so much for the reviews! I love reading every single one. Keep them coming! **


	8. Chapter 8 It's All Coming Back to Me Now

**Song Used Throughout Chapter: 'It's All Coming Back to Me Now' by Meatloaf**

**Warning: This chapter contains content that may be offensive to some readers!**

-x-

We sat on the beach and talked for hours reminiscing in the past and talking about the future. We never once spoke again about Tessa. I had made it pretty clear that I didn't want to hear about her. I loved having Ric beside me again, even if he was in love with someone else now. He still smelt the same and spoke in the same way. Everything about him was the same, apart from something that I couldn't quite lay my finger on. The sparkle that was once in his eyes wasn't there anymore and the usual bounce in his step had gone.

We laughed together as Ric told me about Colleen's new 'boyfriend' and Pippa's sudden interest in boys at the tender age of six years old.

-x-

_There were nights when the wind was so cold  
That my body froze in bed  
If I just listened to it  
Right outside the window_

_I finished crying in the instant that you left  
And I can't remember where or when or how  
And I banished every memory you and I had ever made_

-x-

I had fought the urge to ask him, for the whole night until I couldn't wait any longer or I would burst. "Why didn't you write to me, Ric? Or phone me, or anything! I waited for you. I waited for three whole years, but you never got in contact. It wasn't over for me when I left Ric. But now… it's too late." Tears prickled in my eyes as I watched Ric's smile fade into a frown. I stood up and wiped the sand from my legs, before starting to walk back up towards the Surf Club. That was one huge mistake.

"I couldn't Mattie. It was too hard." I stopped walking and turned round to look at him. He started walking towards me, I tried to back away but something kept my feet glued to the spot. "Everything around me reminded me of you. Everything. I couldn't handle writing to you, 'cos it would just remind me of what I would never have again. I still love you, Matilda. A part of me will always love you." Thunder echoed through the sky as he finished that sentence and rain appeared from nowhere, absolutely soaking us both.

-x-

_There were moments of gold  
And there were flashes of light  
There were things I'd never do again  
But then they'd always seemed right  
There were nights of endless pleasure  
It was more than any laws allow  
Baby Baby..._

-x-

"You…you love me," I stuttered. Our faces just centimetres apart now. I could feel his hot breath against my lips and the heat radiating off his body.

"YES!" he shouted. "It wasn't over! It still isn't over!" And with that our lips came crashing together and we kissed roughly and passionately. Making up for all those years we had lost. We explored the inside of each other's mouths with our tongues and moaned in pleasure as we did so. I jumped up and wrapped my legs around his waist. Oh god, I had missed this so much! I ran my fingers through his hair, wanting him so much. Every part of him. He smoothly moved his hands down my back and pulled me closer. I kissed him with all the strength I could muster as he started walking forwards, carrying me towards the caravan park.

-x-

_There were those empty threats and hollow lies  
And whenever you tried to hurt me  
I just hurt you even worse  
And so much deeper_

_But if I touch you like this  
And if you kiss me like that  
It was so long ago  
But it's all coming back to me  
If you touch me like this  
And if I kiss you like that  
It was gone with the wind  
But it's all coming back to me  
(It's all coming back, it's all coming back to me now)_

-x-

Van 28. That was the caravan he had taken me to. He opened the door carefully with one hand as his other was occupied, holding me up. We hadn't stopped kissing the whole way there. The rain didn't bother us; although it beat against our faces so hard, we were too caught up in the moment to even notice. The wind blew our soaking wet hair to the side and our clothes stuck to our bodies with the damp.

-x-

Ric lay me down on the bed and our lips separated for a moment. I looked up at him towering over me and smiled, this was what I had dreamt about the whole time I had lived in France, this one moment. His lips were red and swollen from kissing me so much and his eyes were filled with lust, pure lust and love. Just as I imagined my own to look like as well. Our lips met once more in a love-fuelled kiss. I had completely forgotten that this was so wrong. That I shouldn't be doing this. All I could see right now was Ric and I, together. My desire – filled mind taking over.

His lips slowly moved down from my lips to my neck, and the rest of that night was history...

-x-

_(It's all coming back to me now)  
And when you kiss me like this  
(It's all coming back to me now)  
And when I touch you like that  
(It's all coming back to me now)  
If you do it like this  
(It's all coming back to me now)  
And if we…_

-x-

**A/N: Just watched 'The Notebook' yesterday and I kind of re-wrote the scene from that to put in my story (just in case you thought it was quite familiar)! I hope that wasn't too steamy for you :P lol! That's about as graphic as it will get, not really comfortable going further than that! Anyway, I've decided that I will be updating quite regularly this week since next week I'm away and there won't be any updates :( I've written more on my computer so I'm a bit ahead of you guys now. Please keep reviewing! It makes my day :)**


	9. Chapter 9 Regret

I stirred slightly in an unfamiliar bed. I teased open my eyes and suddenly became aware of the body lying next to me. The morning sunlight shone through the windows of the caravan and brightened up the walls. What had I done last night?

"Ric," I whispered harshly while shaking him to try and wake him up. "Ric!"

"Huh? What… where am I…? Oh my God!!"

"Tell me about," I said sarcastically.

"Did we… did we… you know…?" Ric stuttered. He was just as flustered as I was.

"Well it looks that way! What the hell have we done?"

"I don't understand," Ric said. "I didn't drink that much last night."

"I don't think either of us did."

Ric sighed and put his head in his hands. I felt like doing the same but one of us had to make a quick exit, otherwise this would look completely suss.

"Look Ric, last night was one huge mistake. It can't happen again."

"I know it's just, what got into me, Mattie? I didn't think about Tessa once last night, what got into **us**?"

"Let's just forget this ever happened, okay?" I said grabbing another bed sheet so I could cover myself as I searched for my clothes.

"It's going to be pretty ha-"

"No Ric! This never happened, we couldn't hurt Tessa like that."

"I know."

-x-

I had run out of that caravan so fast and straight past the diner to Tony's house. Hopefully he would still be asleep. It was 8.15am, so it was unlikely but I could still hope.

-x-

I sorted my messy clothes, which had been thrown on moments before as I walked up the front doorsteps; I had to cover my tracks carefully. I slowly opened the door and tiptoed in carefully. The house seemed quiet and no one was in sight. I breathed a sigh of relief as I walked further into the lounge.

"BUSTED!" Lucas shouted as he appeared from nowhere.

"Lucas, you idiot! You made me jump out of my own skin!" I screamed at him.

"So… where have you been?" he said smugly. "Still wearing last night's clothes I see."

"Yeah well I lost track of time and crashed down at the beach, okay?"

"No you didn't."

"Erm... yes I did!"

"No you didn't. Dad's already searched all over the beach and at the diner and at the Surf Club and at th-"

"Damn it." I cursed under my breath. Tony knew I had stayed out all night. I might not be a silly sixteen year old anymore, but I could tell he still thought of me as one in his eyes.

"So Mattie, who were you with last night?" Lucas asked with a grin spread across his face.

"Who says I was with anyone, Luc?" I was definitely not telling Lucas because he'd tell Cassie and then I'd get the whole third degree from her. It was best that last night stayed a complete secret.

"The look on your face says it all."

"Just shut up Lucas! You may be one of my best friends but that doesn't mean I have to tell you everything." I said as I walked away into my old room that was still untouched from when I had left it three years ago.

-x-

There was a loud knock at my bedroom door and Tony and Jack came bursting in.

"Tony I'm so sorry about last night I-"

"It's okay Tilly, I was worried that's all but we can save that for later."

"Oh okay. So why are you here? And Jack?" I asked him. He had probably just clocked off work since he was still in his uniform.

"Mattie there's something I need to tell you…"

-x-

**A/N: Sorry to leave you like that but I'm in the middle of packing! There should be one, maybe two chapters up before I leave on Monday. Thank you for the excellent reviews, I feel so happy! Please keep reviewing, it makes me smile :)**


	10. Chapter 10 Life Gets Turned Around

"What?" I replied in a state of shock. My eyes were frozen to the one spot on the foot of my bed, where I had hung my handbag from last night on the knob on the footboard.

"Look Mattie, we're doing everything in our power to find him, but you're still in severe danger," Jack said loudly. "You and Ric."

"I don't understand what did I ever do to him?"

"You took away the chance for him to get revenge on Ric. You thought up of the plan. You went to Detective Baker. You…" I put my hand up to signal for Jack to stop. I couldn't listen to this anymore.

"Okay. I get it Jack. How did he ever manage to escape though?"

"Johnny Cooper is cunning. You've gotta give him that one. Probably a few of the guards helped. As well as some of the gang members on the outside. In fact, I'm quite surprised this is only coming now."

If looks could kill then Jack would have dropped dead there and then. With glares from both Tony and I. Johnny Cooper had escaped from prison. It was as simple and as complicated as that. And he was after two people that supposedly 'ruined his life'.

"I know this probably isn't the best time for you, Mattie. Believe me, none of us wanted this to happen but it has." Tony reassured in a hushed tone.

"Johnny left a letter in his cell, we thought we better show it to you and Ric now. This is just a photocopied version since we need the original for evidence." Jack handed me a letter, with scrawled handwriting scribbled all over it. I could just about make it out.

_To everyone that reads this,_

_I was obviously successful in my plans if you are reading this letter. No offence or anything, but you know, prison wasn't for me. Anyway to the point… two people are going to pay for what they have done to me. Two people who are so "precious" to one another. Ric Dalby and Matilda Hunter. They roped my brother in and they made my life a living hell, just like I will make their own._

_Johnny._

I stayed still and silent as I read the letter over and over again. Why me? I thought to myself. Was my life destined to be ruined?

"As you've probably guessed, you can't stay here now. It's way too obvious." Jack interrupted my thoughts. "We want to keep you in a safe house for a few days, just until things calm down a bit, until Johnny's caught again."

I scoffed at that last comment. "You really think you're going to be able to catch him again, Jack? Don't you remember how hard it was last time?" I asked softly.

"Well…" Jack started before I cut him off.

"Wait a minute. A safe house? That's what you said before right?" Jack nodded. "You want me to stay alone in a house that is isolated from everywhere else until you've caught him?" I yelled. I knew I shouldn't get angry with Jack, but this was hardly what I expected to come home to. My return had already become a disaster after last night with Ric.

"No, not completely alone. I'll be there keeping an eye on you. Also, Ric has to be hidden as well." I felt my eyes widen and all of the colour drain from my already-pale face. Ric? **Ric?**

-x-

The walk I had taken along the beach had relaxed my thoughts for a while. Of course, Jack and another two officers were just up the road watching me like hawks. I was carrying my shoes in my left hand and used the other one to wipe away the stray tears that began to fall. I breathed in the salty ocean air and wiggled my toes in the soft, golden sand. The beach was basically deserted, apart from a few children playing in the sea. Well that's what I thought until I felt myself collide with another body.

I looked up into Ric's eyes. He was also unnaturally pale. We spent a few moments just examining each other, until Ric held his arms out and I ran freely into them. I just needed to feel safe and that's what I felt in his grasp.

"Why us, Ric?" I cried. "He already tried to ruin our lives. Can't he just leave us alone?" I sobbed into his shirt.

"I know," he soothed while rubbing my back as my mum used to do when I was a child. "I felt the same when Tessa told me." At the sound of Tessa's name I froze, and I remembered how we had betrayed her trust. Ric could sense how tense I had become as he let me go and pushed me back so he could look directly into my eyes.

"Did you tell her?" I asked in a whisper.

"No, I couldn't Mattie. I don't love her, but I still care about her. There isn't any point in telling her now, you don't want to be with me." I couldn't believe he was saying this.

"Ric! She deserves to know!"

"I know, but we're going away in an hour. It's hardly going to be enough time to tell her is it?"

"No, but you promise to tell her as soon as we get back?" **If** we ever get back, I thought to myself.

"Of course."

Silence surrounded us again as we stared at anything but each other. Then I suddenly remembered what he said to me last night. I had sobered up and the night's memories were slowly beginning to flood back into my head.

"Did you mean it?" I asked. New sets of tears were now falling down my cheeks slowly.

"Mean what?" Ric asked, he was obviously confused.

"You… you... said you loved me."

"I meant it, Mattie. I never stopped, not for a second. You were, **are** my world and I don't think I will ever completely let you go."

-x-

The car was packed up, and Jack sat in the driver's seat, waiting for me to say my goodbyes. It was only a few days, and I knew that. McGrath had said that it could only be for a few days, even if Johnny was still on the loose by then, they needed it for some case that was not allowed to be discussed.

I hopped into the seat beside Jack and we drove off to the Van Park House to pick up Ric. I was going to be fine sleeping and living in the same room as him while we were there, I had to be.

-x-

When we arrived at Ric's house we were met with the sight of a passionate goodbye kiss between Tessa and Ric. I couldn't help but feel this strange feeling inside of me. I wasn't jealous was I?

Ric walked towards the car and I had to control myself again, although I'm sure that Jack had noticed my reaction. He opened the back door and sat down, giving me a shy smile that I returned.

-x-

**A/N: Thanks for the reviews guys, I really appreciate them! I'll probabaly update tomorrow as I am going away on Monday morning. Please keep reviewing!**


	11. Chapter 11 We Talked All Night

The anxious journey was quiet, too quiet. Jack didn't make the situation any better with his constant reminders that our lives were in danger. As if we hadn't heard that enough in the last twelve hours. I sat in the front seat of the car, twiddling with my long hair, just like I always did in uncomfortable situations. To be honest, the whole 'Johnny Situation' was the least of my worries at the moment. I was still in love with Ric; the man I spent the night with last night. To make things worse, he had already declared his love twice to me in the time I had been back and he had a girlfriend who I had become great friends with. In fact, I'd be happy if someone just killed me now, got it over and done with.

"Here we are," Jack sighed. He too would definitely rather be at home just now. He had a baby and a wife to look after; he shouldn't need to be here.

"Thanks Jack," I said as he opened the car door to let me out. I took in the open bush land around me. We were right in the centre of it. Nowhere to run. Tall trees were our barriers, isolating us from the happenings in the world. Everything was green, and the fresh air was surprisingly calming. Birds sung cheerily in the afternoon sun that beat down on our skin.

Ric and I were led to a building that looked older than the trees that surrounded me. I cautiously opened it, scared to make a sound. There then was a narrow staircase before me, Jack waved his hand, gesturing for me to walk down them and I did.

It took a while for my eyes to adjust to the darkness that was downstairs, and when they did, I wished for them to go back to seeing darkness. Around me, were three separate rooms, all covered in cobwebs and furniture way past its sell-by date. The walls were made of a dull and dingy-coloured wood. There wasn't a carpet, just cold, hard concrete. How inviting?

"They call this place a safe house?" Ric said. "This house had more safety hazards than what's legal!!" he joked.

"I am **not **staying here guys! There is no way you can make me sleep in this hell-hole!"

"You'd rather die then, Mattie?" Jack asked, he was obviously not in the mood for one of my rants.

"I'm considering it," I muttered under my breath. Thankfully, Jack didn't hear me. Ric did though.

"So," Ric started, changing the subject. "Where's the luxurious bedroom then?"

"You're standing in it."

"What?" I yelled. This couldn't get any worse, no matter what happened.

"You two are in this room. That's the bathroom over there," Jack pointed straight ahead, " and that," he now pointed to the room on the right, "is my room."

"Why the hell do you get your own room?" Ric and I asked in unison.

"Because… I'm older, smarter and definitely wiser," he answered smugly.

"Yeah right!" we both scoffed.

"Plus, I've got to work on the case, no resting for me I'm afraid."

"Aww poor Jacky! Does he have to work?" I said mockingly in a baby voice.

"Yes he does! So you guys are going to have to enjoy each other's company instead of my own as well." He replied. "Oh and Mattie?"

"What?" I hissed.

"Just remember Ric has a girlfriend that isn't you now!"

What was that supposed to mean. If I was alive by the end of this, Jack certainly wouldn't be. I could guarantee that.

-x-

"Oh my God!" I yelled, frustrated. We had to sleep in sleeping bags on a concrete floor. Concrete! I couldn't get comfortablez and go to sleep at all. I hated it to admit it but part of the reason was that Ric was sleeping less than a metre away.

"Matilda! Seriously! Shut up! I remember you being a moaner before, but **this **is just ridiculous."

"Well, Ric people change! I mean, since when did you call me 'Matilda'?"

"Sorry," he sighed. "I just didn't think we were close enough now for me to call you 'Mattie'."

"Fine, if that's how you feel, 'E'ric." With that we both burst into fits of giggles.

"Okay, well that's just weird." Ric laughed.

"See what I mean?"

-x-

The next few hours were spent talking about the old times. We had given up on the idea of sleeping, with my constant moaning and Ric's irritating tossing and turning. It was now three o' clock and neither of us were showing any signs of being tired.

"Do you remember that game of dares we played, the four of us?" Ric laughed to himself.

"How could I forget?" I groaned. "Colleen has always taken the time to talk to me about patriotism every once and a while now!"

"That was hilarious! I'll always remember the look on all those customers faces when you suddenly started singing the anthem!"

"Yeah, well it wasn't quite as hilarious as your sudden change in fashion sense!" I laughed hysterically.

"I'm never going to live that down am I?"

"Nope," I shook my head. "Never."

"So, what are you guys talking about?" Jack asked cheerily while entering the room.

"Just about that game of dares we played a few years ago." I replied.

"Yeah, you know when Luc wrapped you're patrol car in toilet paper!" Ric said. I turned to glare at Ric and his expression suddenly changed when he realised what he had done.

"That was Luc! I'll kill him!" His face suddenly went red with rage and he clenched his fists. Ric and I shared a worried glance. "Nah, it's cool. Dad told me ages ago!" he laughed. "You should of seen your faces though, priceless!"

"Haha," I said sarcastically as I threw my pillow at him.

"How's the investigation going?" Ric asked.

"Absolutely nowhere."

"That bad?" I asked, now I was getting concerned. Jack was never usually this negative.

"Well, a man matching the description we sent out was seen around eight miles from the area. Then again, there are many men in the area with short dark hair and a big build." Jack let out a sad laugh.

"So we shouldn't be worrying?" Ric piped up.

"No, not just yet."

-x-

"Well guys, I'm heading to bed now. Just shout if you need me, okay?" Jack said.

"Yep, sure."

"Yeah."

"So Lucas and Cassie, huh? Wasn't expecting that at all!" I said.

"None of us were. I guess they just got closer after you left. Since, I was kind of spaced out for a while, it was just them." Ric replied. I felt really bad; Martha had said he had a hard time after I left.

"But marriage? Aren't they a bit young?" I asked, ignoring the last comment.

"That's exactly what I said! I asked Cassie countless times whether she was pregnant, but she was certain she wasn't. I don't know why else they'd wanna get married…"

"They love each other, you tool!" I replied, laughing. "I'm taking it that your the Best Man?"

"Yep. Head Bridesmaid?"

"Uh-huh." I nodded.

"I guess we have a couple parties to plan then!" Ric said excitedly while rubbing his hands together like a little boy. I just laughed along with him.

-x-

"So, you and Tessa, how long's that been going on?" I couldn't help it, I needed to know, so I asked.

Ric hesitated but eventually gave in and answered. "About three months, since she came to the Bay."

"Does she know how we know each other yet?"

"Well yeah. Only because of the letter Johnny left. She was waiting for me when I got back from… well you know…" he said rubbing the back of his neck.

"Yeah, I know." I said sadly.

"Do you regret it?" he blurted out.

"Of course! Ric, you have a girlfriend. A very nice one for that matter."

"I don't, regret it that is," he said staring at the wall in front of him. I couldn't see him very well since we weren't allowed lights on.

I snapped my head to look at him. What did he think he was doing? "Ric, you don't know what you're talking about, you're just confused. I am too-"

"Mattie, I am anything but confused," he interrupted. "I've never been able to love another girl since you, I never will.

"I know it's hard Ric but-"

"I'm not finished!" he yelled. I was getting scared; Ric never got this worked up. "When you left I was a wreck, and I'm not exaggerating. It hurt so much; I really thought my heart was about to break in two. It took me months, **months** to get over the feeling that made me think life wasn't worth living, the one that made me want to drink all of my troubles away or jump on the first plane to Paris that I could get. I tried writing, like I explained before, but every time I did, it reminded me of what I would, **could** never have." He paused to take a well-deserved breath. "Every second of every day, was you. Just you, Mattie. You were all I thought of, day and night."

Tears covered my face by this time, how could he do that to me so easily? "Stop it, Ric! STOP! We can't keep doing this," my voice quivered. "We have to forget the past. We're always going to love each other, Ric. Always. But sometimes, that isn't enough to drop everything for."

"What did you just say?" Ric asked.

"I said that love isn't enough to drop everything-"

"No! The other part…"

I sighed. " I'll always love you."

I should have stopped him. I knew I should. But a switch was flicked on inside me and I went into over-drive. When his lips edged closer to mine, I did nothing. Not a thing. I let him kiss me softly at first, while he wiped away my tears with his thumb gently. Then, without warning I deepened the kiss and let his hands wander, and before I knew it we were in the same situation as we found ourselves in the night before…

-x-

**A/N: So... packings all done, and I'm leaving first thing in the morning. I hope you guys are enjoying the story so far, I'll be writing more chapters over the next week so I can post them when I get back. Also, at first I decided that this would end in a couple of chapters, but I've got a brand new plan and I am hoping to continue it for many more chapters. You know, one of the fics that isn't just about the one story line. So expect this to go on forever! I know I've said this many times before, but thank you for the kind reviews, I really love them all!**


	12. Chapter 12 Busted!

I was in heaven. I'd forgotten how much love I felt when I was with Ric. We had slept together, for the second time in forty-eight hours. Tessa shot to the back of my mind as soon as our lips met. Ric had this strange power over me and I couldn't get enough of it.

We lay together in one sleeping bag. Ric had his arms tightly around me, protecting me. I just stayed still, taking in this moment because it would be over very soon. I closed my eyes and let my head rest against his toned chest, moving up and down with his breathing.

"Guys? What the-?" Jack startled me, as he walked in the room, demanding an explanation.

-x-

"Jack, I can explain-"

"Oh you better explain, Matilda," Jack cut in.

"Jack, this isn't what it looks like-" Ric decided to help.

"It's not is it? So you guys were just naked, in the same sleeping bag, all over each other for another reason?"

"Jack! For god's sake. Will you let one of us a finish a sentence." We were both fully dressed now and standing in the middle of the room having an extremely heated argument.

"I thought you guys were over, especially since Ric has a girlfriend!"

"We were! We **are**!" I looked over at Ric, who looked slightly wounded at what I had said. But it was true, wasn't it?

"Yeah," Ric finally responded. "It was a heat of the moment thing! Impulse, nothing else." I gave him a look, which thanked him.

"You seem to be forgetting Tessa here! She works with me! Am I supposed to go back to work knowing what I saw and not mention it to her?"

"Ric is going to tell her as soon as he gets home. We decided that after what happened between us yesterday…" I trailed off and mentally cursed myself. Now I'd really blown it.

"What?" Jack roared. "You mean this wasn't the first time? You've done this before?" He was furious now. I was his sweet, innocent little sister, not someone who slept with someone else's boyfriend.

I shuffled uncomfortably on the spot, and I refused to look at anything but the ground.

"Wait, that's where you were when dad was looking for you, wasn't it?"

I nodded, ignoring the tears that had spilt over the edge of my eyes. We were all red in the face from the yelling and arguing we had done. Our shouts had bounced of the walls, making the sound unbearable and I now had a headache.

"Look guys, I know it's hard to forget you're first love and all. But this was completely wrong, okay? It cannot happen again. Do you understand me?"

I couldn't believe he was doing this. I don't care how wrong this whole situation was. He had no right talking to us like that, ordering us about. "We're not kids anymore Jack!" I screamed at him. "To be perfectly honest with you, it's none of your business and even if it was, you have no right telling us what to do." I took a deep breath. "We're not idiots. We know what we did was out of order and we regret it so much, but it's done with now, okay?" I yelled. "It was wrong," I spoke softer and quieter that time. It was too much, all of this, everything.

I broke down and cried. Not caring how much I was scaring the two grown men standing before me. I leant against the nearest wall and slid down until I was sitting. They both rushed over to me and held me. I sobbed uncontrollably. Just wishing the pain away. I was a different person than I was before. The cards that life had dealt me changed everything about me. This wasn't who I was. I was just so confused.

"Oh sorry, did I interrupt something?" A cold and cruel voice came from the stairway. He was a shadow, dark and unnerving. I froze and stopped crying immediately.

"Huh?" Jack turned around, confused. Only to be met with a blow to the head by a metal object.

"Jack!" I screamed.

"Long time no see, eh Dalby?" Johnny Cooper appeared from the shadows. He held a gun close to his body. Looking more determined for revenge than ever before.

-x-

**A/N: I'm back guys! Hope you enjoyed that chapter, the next one should be up tomorrow. Even though school has become easier now, I have two dancing exams next week that I am devoting all of my time to. Please bear with me, after next week, updates should be much more often and more regular. Thanks for all of the reviews, you are all fantastic! Please keep reviewing!**


	13. Chapter 13 Extraordinary Day

**A/N: The song used in italics in this chapter is called 'Extraordinary Day' by Delta Goodrem**

**Also, there is one use of bad language in this chapter. I don't like swearing, but I thought it was appropriate in here.**

-x-

"Johnny," Ric hissed through his teeth. His fists had clenched and his whole body had tensed.

"I was wondering if you two would still be together. Should have known eh? 'True Love' lasts a lifetime." Johnny spat. He was angry and determined.

I couldn't take my eyes off Jack. He lay there, out cold. A thin trickle of blood came from his forehead where the gun had smacked him. I looked for the slightest sign of breathing… There! His chest moved up and down. He was alive.

"What do you want from us Johnny?" Ric boldly asked. "No more lives to ruin in the prison?"

Johnny laughed him off. "Believe me, I was just getting warmed up three years ago. You ain't seen nothing yet."

-x-

_Change, like secrets in the wind I hear the whispers madame butterfly  
Spread your precious wings I watch you fly away_

_I know, I can't change fate of that July the 8th and it was never the same  
it was never the same again,_

_I know, this stage is frightening but its oh so enlightening is this how karma goes_

-x-

I closed my eyes. Willing myself to wake up, and find that all of this was a dream. I would still be in Paris and none of these troubles would be with me.

Johnny had tied our hands and our feet together. We couldn't move. He had complete control over us. The ropes dug into my wrists and my ankles like knives, I could feel them burning at the tiniest movement.

"You're a bit quiet over there, darling. How's about I hear that pretty voice of yours." I resisted the temptation to bring up the contents of my stomach at his last words. Jack still lay on the concrete floor, unconscious. Tears welled up in my eyes for what felt like the millionth time today.

"We're going to be fine, Mattie. Trust me. I won't let anything happen to you." Ric whispered. I nodded, knowing that he was trying to convince himself as well.

"Shut up, Dalby! Unless you want to die sooner than planned, that is," Johnny smirked. If I could I would have slapped him in the face there and then. It was all that scum deserved.

"You would actually kill someone yourself! I thought you would get someone else to do it, just like you got Jase to kill Rocco," I emphasised my last words, instantly regretting what I had said when Johnny walked towards me until our faces were just centimetres apart.

-x-

_Who would have thought when chance came calling_

-x-

He stood there taking my face in. His breath smelt disgusting, rotten and his teeth were a yellow colour. It made me feel physically sick.

"I was going to kill you first, make Dalby watch you die. That would make him suffer. But now I'm torn…" he took a step back and looked at us both. "Maybe it should be him first."

My heart pounded against my chest. My breaths were short and rapid; I was scared to say the least. My cheeks were flushed and my muscles were tense. This was it. The end.

"Now I need to make a phone call. Where's the phone in this joint?"

"Over there," Ric nodded towards Jack's office.

Johnny walked away, leaving Ric and I petrified, on the other side of the room.

-x-

Who would have thought when chance came calling that this would be my defining story and who could have guessed on my life's journey I could find my way through this extraordinary day.

_-x-_

"I'm going to get us out of here, Mattie. I promise." Ric tried to soothe me. It wasn't working.

"How the hell do you plan on doing that?" I spoke coldly.

"I don't know," Ric whispered, honestly.

-x-

Johnny walked briskly towards me and grabbed my shoulder. His gripped cut off my circulation and made my blood run cold. "You're coming with me," was all he said. I gave one last look at Jack, who was starting to get some colour back in his cheeks. I prayed for him to wake up now, save me, but he didn't. I moved my glance towards Ric, who had an extremely worried expression across his face; I shed a tear and began to walk forward with Johnny.

"Stop!" Johnny turned around sharply at the sounding of Ric's quivering voice, and I felt and excruciating pain in my shoulder, there was a crack and I felt it drop. He had dislocated it! I tried not to let the pain show on my face but it didn't work and instead silent tears fell. "Take me instead. Kill me now. Just don't hurt Matilda. I'm begging you."

What was he doing? This can't of being happening. I didn't know what was worse. Losing my own life, or letting Ric go. No! What was I saying? I couldn't go on without Ric.

"No Ric!" I yelled, making sure it was right in Johnny's eardrum. "Go on, Johnny. What are you waiting for? Take me." I said firmly.

"I think I'm going to puke! You'd both rather the other went on living than save your own life. How touching," he growled sarcastically. "Fine you know what? Dalby, I will take you first. Then I'll come back for the 'Princess' here."

He threw me back to the ground even though I didn't want to let go. My shoulder was throbbing but that was the least of my problems right now.

Johnny led Ric out. "I love you, Mattie," he whispered, struggling in Johnny's grasp.

"I love you too!"

Then he was gone. I cried and cried, well howled actually. Jack started to stir.

"Jack! Jack come on help me Jack!" I screamed. My screams echoed through the house, almost deafening me.

"Mattie?" he said hoarsely.

"Jack he's going to kill him. Quick!"

But it was too late. In a single gunshot I could feel my heart being ripped out of my chest and shred into pieces. Then there was silence.

A sob escaped from my mouth and tears came streaming down my face. Jack ran to me and held me tight as I cried into his shoulder.

"Nooooo!" I screamed. "No!" Uncontrollable emotions all came at once and I collapsed. Jack untied me and tried to bring me to my feet but I wouldn't move.

-x-

Extraordinary day,  
This would be my defining story,  
And who could have guessed on my life's journey I could find my way through this Extraordinary day.

"You son of a bitch!" I spat at him. "You killed him!" I screamed at the top of my voice. My body racked with sobs again and Jack held me close.

"Get out now, you'll suffer enough with the love of your life dead. I've made sure of that."

"You have no idea what you've done," I hissed at him. "I'm a witness, you'll be punished for this. Ric's family won't let you get away with this. His girlfriend is a police officer, you know that?"

"What?"

"Yep. We haven't been together for years. I thought you'd have known that," I slapped him, hard, in the face. I felt Jack's hand wrap around my good arm and pull me with all his might towards the stairs. We ran and ran as fast as we could. The days events overwhelmed me, my breaths became short and raspy and my legs felt like jelly. Ric was dead. Gone. I would never see him again.

I saw it, the light. Police sirens were sounding everywhere and men in blue uniforms surrounded me. Ambulances sped into the area as well, with paramedics running into the trees. And with that came darkness.

-x-

_Extraordinary day,  
This would be my defining story,  
And who could have guessed on my life's journey I could find my way through this Extraordinary day._

-x-

**A/N: Please don't all send me hate mail at once! Don't worry though, well maybe you should... Anyway, as a thanks for all the lovely reviews I decided to put up another chapter tonight (well it's almost midnight, so morning!) as well as the one I'll put up tomorrow. I won't keep you waiting for too long, I'm not that evil :P Thanks a million for reviewing, keep on doing it!**


	14. Chapter 14 Bring Me to Life

**A/N: The song used in this chapter is called 'Bring Me to Life' by Evanescence.**

-x-

I woke up and opened my eyes, only to shut them again once I was met with a blinding light. I remembered voices, calling me, trying to get me to wake up. Jack was holding my hand. Tony ran up to me. I think I had fainted.

I sat up and went to rub my eyes, but my right shoulder was in a sling. That's when I remembered.

Ric was dead.

Leaning back again, so I was lying flat on my back again, I began to cry. Cry for Ric. Did he go through any pain? Why him? He was going to take me! He shouldn't have listened to Ric.

Tony, Jack, Lucas and Cassie came running into my room, with a nurse right behind them.

"Hi sweetheart. I'm so glad you're okay!" Tony rushed over to me and kissed me on the forehead. I stayed emotionless though, not saying a word.

"Johnny has been arrested, he's staying put this time as well, Tilly. You don't need to worry." I moved my gaze from the wall straight in front of me to Lucas' face. Why wasn't he upset? His best friend was dead. Did he not have a heart?

"I thought I'd lost you, Mattie. Don't ever do that to me again, okay?" Cassie laughed. Cassie wasn't upset either. In fact no one in the room looked like their friend had been killed.

-x-

(Wake me up)  
Wake me up inside  
(I can't wake up)  
Wake me up inside  
(Save me)  
Call my name and save me from the dark  
(Wake me up)  
Bid my blood to run  
(I can't wake up)  
Before I come undone  
(Save me)  
Save me from the nothing I've become

"How can you guys be so upbeat?" I asked through my tears. I carried on when I saw the confused look on their faces. "Jack? You haven't said anything have you?"

Jack slowly shook his head and I burst into tears.

"Hasn't anyone even considered the fact that Ric isn't here?" I looked around at the clueless people around me. I took a deep breath. "He killed him. Ric's gone. He was shot," I whispered softly before turning to bury my face in my pillow.

"What?" Cassie's voice cracked.

"I can't officially tell you guys until the body is found but…"

"Is it true, Jack?" Lucas said impatiently, trying to control his emotions.

"Yes, Ric was shot by Johnny. There's no trace of a body, if there isn't one in the next few days, this will be a murder investigation."

-x-

_Now that I know what I'm without  
You can't just leave me  
Breathe into me and make me real  
Bring me to life _

(Wake me up)  
Wake me up inside  
(I can't wake up)  
Wake me up inside  
(Save me)  
Call my name and save me from the dark  
(Wake me up)  
Bid my blood to run  
(I can't wake up)  
Before I come undone  
(Save me)  
Save me from the nothing I've become

Bring me to life  
(I've been living a lie, there's nothing inside)  
Bring me to life

**One Week Later…**

I sat at the beach, the same spot that I had sat at every day since I had gotten out of hospital. My eyes were now too dry to even attempt to cry. I had no voice from all of the screaming and sobbing I had done, though I still tried to shout. Everyone had been so sympathetic, although they didn't know the real story. Tessa was devastated when she found out. She had fainted just like I had. I still couldn't believe it. Any minute now, I expected Ric to come up behind me and scare the living daylights out of me. But he wouldn't.

The body still hadn't been found, traces of his blood had though. He was pronounced dead yesterday afternoon. The doctors and police agreed that no one would have been able to survive this long, especially with a gunshot wound. That was if he didn't die instantly anyway.

"Mattie," Tasha called. "Lunch is ready," she said softly. Tasha and Robbie had come back to the Bay when they heard about the 'incident' as everyone was calling it. They had been great support even though I had hardly said a word to either of them since they came.

I looked out at the ocean. Where we had spent so many fun times, just splashing about in there. Ric would throw me in, and I'd swear revenge on him. I missed him so much already, his presence, and his voice, his everything.

I hadn't told Tessa about the nights I had spent with Ric. That was his job; I cursed him for dying just so he could get out of it. I gave out a small laugh at my stupidity.

"Why Ric huh? Couldn't you just have left me alone? If we'd have never have fallen in love, if we'd have never met, this wouldn't have happened!" I shouted out to the sky. "If we hadn't fallen in love, you would still be here! Living life to the full."

-x-

-x-

"Ric! I hate this! I hate myself! It should have been me. You didn't have to die! If I'd never been with you! If you'd never met me! This would have never happened! Why did we have to meet?" I shouted.

"It wouldn't have made a difference, I was in love with you before I met you anyway…" I froze, now I was imagining things. I really needed to sleep.

I turned round and there he was, in the flesh. Ric.

-x-

_(Wake me up)  
Wake me up inside  
(I can't wake up)  
Wake me up inside  
(Save me)  
Call my name and save me from the dark  
(Wake me up)  
Bid my blood to run  
(I can't wake up)  
Before I come undone  
(Save me)  
Save me from the nothing I've become_

_(Bring me to life)  
I've been living a lie, there's nothing inside  
(Bring me to life)_

**A/N: I couldn't kill him and most of you knew I couldn't as well :) I've now written up to chapter twenty two on my computer so there are many more chapters to come. Thank you for the reviews, they make this story worth writing.**


	15. Chapter 15 You Better Explain

I blinked slowly. My eyes were playing tricks on me, weren't they?

Nope. He was still there, just standing still. He looked badly bruised and beaten. Cuts covered his face and spread like a rash down his arms.

"Mattie, I know this will seem completely strange to you, it does to me too."

"Strange? That's one way to describe it, Ric!" I kept my eyes on his injuries, taking them in slowly, one by one. My eyes were glassy and gave off a sudden coldness.

I was angry, no furious. The pain I had felt in the past week had been for nothing. I pinched myself to make sure it wasn't a dream.

"Look, I was as surprised as you are when I found out that **you **weren't dead." He was confusing me now and he could see it in my expression. "When Johnny took me out… of the room… he… he."

"He what Ric?"

"He basically beat the crap out of me. I was positive he was getting ready to shoot me after that. He loaded the gun and brought his finger to the trigger. I closed my eyes, just wanting him to get it over and done with. When I heard the bullet release I braced myself but nothing came. He had shot at the sky." I couldn't believe what I was hearing.

"But Johnny didn't deny you were dead. He may as well have admitted it!"

"Of course he didn't, that was his plan Mattie. To hurt us both more than death ever could. He led you to believe that I had been killed and right after he fired the gun he walked off, telling me he was on his way to get you, he had a knife this time. He said he was going to kill you just like he planned to kill Sal." Ric's eyes filled with tears but he refused to let them affect him.

"Oh Ric… I…I…" There were no words to say. I was so glad he was safe; I felt my heart beat normally again and the depressed feeling that had begun to weigh my mind down was lifted. I just ran at him, with all my might and wrapped my arms around him. We embraced like we had been separated for the whole of our lives. The feeling I never thought I would feel ever again, overwhelmed me. He was safe. Ric was safe.

-x-

It had been half an hour but neither of us dared to move. We needed to be in each other's company. We thought we had lost each other for good.

"Mattie!" Hayley's voice shouted. She was walking towards us down the beach, Jack and Martha followed. "We were about to send out a search party…" she trailed off when she saw who I was hugging. I reluctantly let go of him, and I let Martha grab him in a massive bear hug. "Oh my God," was all Hayley could say.

Jack looked shocked to say the least. The cut on his head was healing, it was a nasty one but the doctors said he was going to be fine.

-x-

We were now all sat in my old house, where I was staying again. Sally, Cassie, Pippa, Brad and Mr Stewart had been called over immediately. They were devastated at Ric's death. All of them shut themselves away from the grief and everyone around them. It reminded me of the way I dealt with my mum's death. They were absolutely ecstatic and just as surprised as I was when they walked into the room to see him.

"I just can't believe this. It's flamin' crazy!" Mr Stewart shouted. The whole family, in fact everyone in the room was crying tears of joy. We had explained everything; we each did it from our points of view. Jack was taking care of the Police side of it. He had said that Ric and I had been through enough.

"I just got the note you left me Sal…" Tessa light voice filled the room from the front door. She let out a high-pitched scream and ran into Ric's arms. I shuffled on the spot uncomfortably. Ric didn't look completely contented with the situation either. That same pang of jealously hit me again. I was still in love with Ric, and we both knew it. This was going to be harder than I thought…

-x-

Tessa had reacted just as I had. Angry at first, then delighted. The feeling was indescribable. Love ran through my veins when I thought of him.

"I've missed you so much!" Tessa cried as she kissed Ric for what seem like the millionth time. Not as much as I had, I thought. That was when I remembered, we had betrayed Tessa's trust and she needed to be told. I felt like such a terrible person. I slept with someone else's boyfriend, twice!

"I'm just going to get a drink," I said croakily as I swallowed down the lump in my throat. I walked into the kitchen and filled up a glass that lay beside the sink. I could hear Ric push Tessa off his lap and walk into the kitchen to join me.

"You okay?" he asked.

"Yeah, I guess so. This whole thing is just… wow!"

"Tell me about it."

We stood in silence for a while until I brought up the topic in my mind.

"You need to tell her, Ric."

"I know I do. I can't just drop it on her now though. She thought I was dead. I can't come back and then suddenly tell her that I'm in love with someone else and I cheated on her. That we're going to get back together... It's just too hard."

"I don't think we could ever be together though, Ric. It's too complicated. I never imagined this happening when I came back here. I never even expected you to still be here. I'm not in the right frame of mind for a relationship right now Ric. And I don't think I could ever go back there. We would break up again, I managed to survive that once. I don't think I could do it again. I just want you to be honest with Tessa. She deserves it."

"Okay, we'll see how it goes..." he said taking my hand softly in his own.

"We can do it together," I whispered, squeezing his hand reassuringly

**A/N: Sorry I haven't been updating like I usually do, school's really hectic with my Standard Grade courses at the moment, but I'm managing :) Anyway, this was just a filler chapter, I needed to put something up. Thank you for the reviews, they mean so much! Also, thank you to those who reviewed my other fic, which was a oneshot. A lot of people have asked if I'm going to continue it, and I have decided I will... someday :P Keep reviewing!**


	16. Chapter 16 A Week Later

It had been a week, a whole week. Neither Ric nor I had managed to muster up the courage to tell Tessa about what happened between us, partly because she had been called away at short notice, to a business trip in the city. Instead, we had spent the week hanging out with Lucas and Cassie, just getting back into the routine it used to be before we got together, best friends and nothing more. Wedding preparations were well under way. I was lucky enough to have missed the real organisation, as I was still in France at the time. We were sat in the Diner, contemplating the colour of the bridesmaid's dresses, they couldn't clash with the men's shirts and ties and definitely not Cassie's carefully planned flowers, everything had to be organised with the most precision.

Lucas had managed to stay patient with Cassie, how he did I will never know. Ric and I had lost it a couple of times, nothing major, we were just sick of the main topic of every conversation being the wedding.

"But Luc! If you're wearing turquoise shirt, how are the bridesmaids supposed to wear red!" Cassie cried, her face was tired and slightly pink with stress. Her eyes still stayed determined though.

"Cassie, honey. Have you never heard of contrast?" Uh-oh, wrong move, Lucas. Cassie's face now went fully red with rage, and I watched as Ric took a deep breath, bracing himself for Cassie's reply.

"Contrast! Lucas, please. That will **not** be contrast! It will be a flipping disaster!"

"Cass, just calm down, okay? Luc was just trying to help," I tried to reason with her.

"Yeah Cass," Ric decided to help. "Listen, why don't Luc and I head back to ours and you girls can follow once you've talked about the dresses by yourselves."

"I hate to admit it, Cassie, but Ric's actually got a good idea there," I smirked at him. "Anyway, guys aren't really supposed to have any input on what the girls wear, so they're no use to us here, are they?"

Cassie nodded and both Ric and Lucas made a quick exit. I tried not to stare too much at Ric as I watched him leave; there was just something about him that I was still very much attracted to.

-x-

"What about this one?" I asked, cautiously as I pointed to a beautiful lilac dress in the catalogue. My last ten suggestions had been quashed before I could finish telling her about them. I watched Cassie, patiently; she seemed to be considering it.

"Yeah, I like it."

"What? You're actually agreeing with something I'm saying?" I mocked.

"For once, yeah."

I studied the dress that seemed to outshine the others on the page. It had a certain air about it, a glittery presence that made the colour even more interesting. It was strapless and ankle-length.

"It'll suit Martha and Belle, perfectly," I added.

"That's the one, Mattie! You found it!" Cassie shouted while pulling me into a hug.

-x-

"Wow! That only took you guys two hours, we weren't expecting you two to come back until at least dinner time." Ric commented, sarcastically as we both walked through the door to the Van Park House, with huge smiles plastered on our faces.

"Haha Dalby! Very funny." I threw back.

"Did you find anything?" Lucas asked as he got up off the couch and wrapped his arms around Cassie, kissing her.

"Yep, the perfect dress for Mattie, Martha and Belle. They'll look beautiful."

"No one could look as gorgeous as you will though, honey." Lucas said to Cassie. He loved her so much.

I looked at Ric uncomfortably from across the room. We had been fine over the past week, apart from when we had to endure the displays of affection that Lucas and Cassie shared, that was when the awkwardness started.

-x-

"See you guys!" Cassie and Lucas called as they left the house. They were off to the jewellers, some business about the rings. Now it was just Ric and I left. It hadn't really been like this since we were at the safe house.

A sense of vulnerability overcame me. I felt open and readable, it was hard to explain exactly what he did to me, I don't think **I** even knew.

"So…" Ric said slowly, while getting up from the couch. "A drink?" he asked.

"Yes, please." You got any OJ?"

"Oh, I've always got OJ!" He laughed.

-x-

"So when are Belle and Drew getting back?" I asked. They hadn't been there when I arrived back in Summer Bay and I was told they were on holiday.

"Probably sometime in the next few days, maybe a couple of weeks at the most. Cassie made them swear to come back before the wedding, if they didn't, she said she'd kill them."

"Yeah, well that's to be expected," I laughed.

"Mattie?" Ric's face suddenly turned serious.

"Yeah?" I stopped laughing.

"We've put it off for a week now. Shouldn't we tell Tess? I can't keep lying to her. She's been on her business trip so we've not had a chance, but I don't know how much longer I can take this." Ric sighed.

"I know, Ric. I feel the same. I just don't know how we're supposed to tell her."

"Tell who, what?" We both turned round to see Tessa standing at the door, suitcases at her sides. She had obviously come back from her business trip early and she needed answers. It was now or never…

-x-

**A/N: I'm sorry nothing seems to be happening in these chapters, I have serious writer's block, I've not managed to write a whole chapter in ages! Oh well, it's the weekend tomorrow, I might be able to get something done then. Thank you for the reviews again, I know their hardly exciting chapters to give feedback on, so thanks! Another thing - any ideas for future storylines will be very much appreciated, I am in the middle of writing my latest one, but there are no more ideas after that :( There's one thing I can promise though, it's a huge twist!!**


	17. Chapter 17 It's Over

"_Do I ever cross your mind?" I ask him._

"_No," Ric replied._

"_Do you like me?"_

"_Not really."_

"_Do you want me?"_

"_No."_

"_Would you cry if I left?"_

_"No."_

"_Would you live for me?"_

"_No."_

"_Would you do anything for me?"_

"_No."_

_"Choose -- me or your life?"_

_"My life."_

_I run away in shock and pain, and only stop when I notice Ric running after me._

_"The reason why you never cross my mind is because you're always on my mind. The reason why I don't like you is because I love you. The reason I don't want you is because I **need** you. The reason I wouldn't cry if you left is because I would die if you left. The reason I wouldn't live for you is because I would die for you. The reason why I'm not willing to do anything for you is because I **would** do everything for you. The reason I chose my life is because you **are** my life."_

-x-

I awoke from my dream, my very strange dream. Tears still stung my eyes and the memories from a few hours ago burned in my mind.

_**A Few Hours Ago…**_

"_You __**WHAT**__?" Tessa screamed. "You…you… were together! More than once!" she was in shock, disbelief. We didn't want to hurt her, but both of us knew what it felt like to be cheated on, or to think you were being cheated on, and neither of us could live a lie like that. We weren't going to take our relationship any further now, I didn't want to._

"_I'm sorry… we're sorry Tess. It just happened we-"_

"_What Ric? You fell in love all over again as soon as your eyes met in the bar? Hand me a bucket, please!" she was on a roll now. Tears began to fall down my cheeks, just as they fell down Tessa's. "I trusted you. You said you would never hurt me, at first I never believed it, what guy can promise you that? Then I started to think I had met him, 'the one'. You know, I made one huge mistake in all of this Ric, I fell in love with you!"_

_And with that she ran out of the door, taking her suitcases with her. Ric grabbed me and held me, comforted me._

"_Ric, I'm the one who should be helping you. You just lost your girlfriend."_

"_There was never anyone but you, Mattie. I could lose everything I ever worked for in life, and be completely happy, as long as you were by my side," he said while stroking my hair and hugging me tightly._

"_I can't do this, Ric. I'm sorry!" I ran out of the house and into my room. I thought of everything that had happened over the last two and a half weeks, and cried myself into a deep sleep._

-x-

"Hey Till. Can't sleep either?" Robbie asked as I walked into the kitchen to fetch a glass of water.

"Nope," I shook my head lazily. I ran the tap and put the cold water into my glass, then I took a seat next to Robbie at the table.

"It's great to be back here. I can't believe how much I've missed this place."

"What? Are you not enjoying Boston?" I asked.

Robbie hesitated. "Not as much as we used to. It's great for Ella, and the high school that I finished my HSC in was great, but now I've finished and Tasha isn't as occupied with Ella, we find ourselves missing home."

"I know what you mean. I felt the same way in Paris."

-x-

After a few moments of discussion about being away from the Bay, Robbie asked me the question that I had been dreading to hear.

"Mattie, I know this is none of my business and you can tell me to get lost right now if you like, but what's going on with you and Ric?"

"It's complicated, Rob" I sighed. "And to be honest with you, it's not the sort of the thing you talk to your brother about."

"I understand." Robbie nodded his head. "You know, I left the day before you and Ric got together, so I've never been able to see how serious your relationship was. Even though that's the case, I can still see this incredible bond between the two of you, you're so relaxed with each other, and it looks like you're in love."

"I don't know what to do, Rob," I cried into his shoulder. "This whole situation is just stressing me out!"

"Only you can figure out what to do, Tilly. The only piece of advice I can give you, is life is too short to waste time making decisions, because before you know it, the opportunity is gone and you find yourself missing something you never had."

-x-

I walked into the Diner the next morning, and saw the one face that I was hoping to avoid today. He looked up from his magazine and smirked when he saw how uncomfortable I was, then he looked back down. God, what a jerk he was being today!

"Hiya dahl, what can I get you this morning?" Irene asked from behind the counter.

"Oh, hi Irene. Can I just have a blueberry muffin when you have time?"

"Sure lovey. I'll get Colleen to bring it over for you in a sec."

I sat down at the nearest table and browsed over the menu to help pass the time. It was hard to avoid the constant staring that was coming from Ric at the other side of the room, but I managed it. Voices buzzed around the room, it was a bright Saturday morning; so many people were off work. I noticed Rachel and Hugh in the background, according to Cassie they were now happily married, and both doing very well. I was happy for them, especially after the way Kim had hurt Rachel, running off with my sister, Kit, she deserved happiness after the sorrow in her life.

"Yoo-hoo! Matilda?" Colleen broke me out of my day dream. "Here's your muffin. We haven't been selling as many of them since you left!" she joked.

"Well that'll change now I'm back for good, Mrs. Smart!"

"Listen, dear. I was wondering if you knew what was happening with young Ric over there? Tessa seems to have disappeared and I was wondering if maybe they had a bit of a tiff last night," Colleen inquired. She was still her nosy self.

"Well Mrs. Smart, it's not really my place to say. It's their business not ours," I lied.

"Okay, well have a good day, Matilda. Sally tells me your having a small Bridal Party gathering this afternoon. I hope it all goes well." I forgot about that! How was I going to survive? Maid of Honour and Best Man always sit together. This was going to be a challenge.

"Thanks Mrs. Smart."

**A/N: I've decided Ric is now going to go through a very 'jerky' stage, like most men do LOL :P Writer's block is still with me and I'm finding it so hard to get any inspiration, so please, if you have any ideas, no matter how weird or far-fetched they are, tell me when you leave a comment! If anyone was wondering... the dream at the beginning of the chapter was just from a silly email I got from one of my friends, and I thought it was just so sweet, it had to go in the story! Just two more weeks of school left until the summer holidays, so I will hopefully be back to writing lots by then! Thanks for the reviews, the next update probably won't be until mid-week, since writing is so much of a chore at the moment! Please review!**


	18. Chapter 18 Arguments

**A/N: There is a storyline mentioned later on in the chapter, that involves spoilers for the UK. Just warning you all :)**

-x-

"Hey Mattie. Come on in! Tony, Jack and Martha have just arrived." Cassie greeted me at the front door. My hair was clipped back apart from two curls, which shaped my face. I wore a silver, knee-length dress, which showed off my long, tanned legs.

"Tilly! We're over here!" Jack waved me down to the corner of the room where every one stood. I hugged him tightly when I reached them.

"Hey, what's wrong?" Jack asked softly.

"I'll tell you later," was all I said. It was all I needed to say. Jack knew about Ric and I, and by the look on his face, he knew partly what this was about too.

-x-

"Did you hear about Tessa? She left Ric, just like that!" Cassie gossiped while we were in the kitchen, preparing the salad.

"Yeah," I said quietly. It was best just to stay out of this, that way no one could get suspicious.

"It's just really strange… oh well, there's plenty more fish in the sea, eh?" I laughed nervously along with her as we brought the meals out to the table that had been specially set up from the lunch today.

-x-

Ric walked down the stairs in an open-necked white shirt with his black, suit jacket on top. I couldn't resist him in shirts like that, and he knew it all too well. This had all become a game to him, he was toying with my emotions, making me feel guilty, and he was slowly succeeding.

I gave him a small smile and a look that told him just to 'drop it'. He smiled back, warmly and I was reassured a little bit. Just a little bit.

-x-

"Do you remember him, Mattie? He was the biggest loser I think I've ever met," Cassie said. We were on the subject of Jules, the guy that came to Summer Bay and caused havoc everywhere he went. He left just before I did, and he certainly made an impression.

"Yeah, what an idiot! He hurt you and he hurt Lily. I can't even list all the bad stuff he did in the couple of months he was here!" I replied.

"He left you to die," Ric mumbled under his breath. He had been surprisingly quiet during the meal, only uttering a few words every so often.

"What?" Lucas asked.

"You weren't here, Luc. It doesn't matter. Anyway. your exaggerating Ric, you know he had reasons for what he did,," I said. Ric was trying to stir up trouble. He had changed over the past two days, I don't know if it was to do with Tessa leaving him or me rejecting him, either way it was starting to make me mad.

"He saw her drowning out in the sea, he wasn't even going to go in after her. He didn't, Lily did instead. Then I ended up saving them both." Ric said calmly. He was making my blood boil now, I tried to stay cool and collective but it wasn't working.

"I bet you thought you were such a hero, Ric. You know why Jules didn't go in after me, and you're still having a go at him!"

"That was no excuse, Mattie! You could have died."

"His girlfriend died drowning, Ric. How would you feel if you saw history repeating itself like that? Would you have still tried to help, knowing the dangers?" I raised my voice slightly.

"That's enough you two," Sally interrupted. "I don't know what's happened here but this is supposed to be about the wedding, so lets get back on the subject."

-x-

The next hour was full of discussion of outfits, the venue, flowers and music. Everything was going smoothly until the couples were paired off for the ceremony and reception.

"So it's Belle and Drew, Jack and Martha, Dad and Sal and Matilda and Ric," Lucas explained around the table.

"What?" Ric and I said in unison.

"Well, you know it's tradition for the Maid of Honour and Best Man to walk down the aisle together."

"Can't we just swap the couples about, and mix us up a bit?" I suggested.

"No Mattie! You know it's too late for that, the wedding is in two weeks!"

"Yes Cassie, I am well aware of that. But it's not that hard to do, is it?"

"No buts, Matilda. The decision is final," Lucas said firmly.

"Fine," I snapped.

-x-

The meal was finished and we were now all scattered around the room, talking and catching up, now that the wedding business was finished. I stood beside Tony, talking to Martha when I caught sight of Ric, glaring at me. I marched over to him, I was fed up. He couldn't keep intimidating me like that.

"What is your problem, Ric?" I hissed.

"Me? It's you that has the problem here, Matilda."

"I've told you not to call me that!"

"I don't care anymore, Mattie! You obviously don't seem to care about me, or feel the same way as you used to."

"I never said that and you know it."

"You may as well have. Every time I've made my feelings clear you've pushed me away. I can't cope with it anymore."

"Did it never cross your mind to think about how I've been feeling in all of this? I have my reasons for not wanting to jump into a relationship with you, Ric! I'm still not over the first time we broke up, if we went back there and broke up again, I don't think I could do it. Actually, I **know** I couldn't do it again!"

We were both yelling by this stage, and all eyes were on us. Thankfully, no one in the room, apart from Jack had any real idea what we were talking about.

"Oh that's right, Mattie! Make it all about you, why don't you?"

"Shut up, Ric! Just shut up! You have turned into such a jerk recently. What's gotten into you?"

"**You** have Mattie! **YOU**! Don't you get it. You mess me up so badly. All I think about now is you, I was getting over you before. I was moving on with my life. I never realised how much I missed you before. Then I saw a glimmer of hope, you said you loved me too, and I thought finally we were going somewhere! Then you rejected me after giving me all these signs that said otherwise!" He lowered his voice to a whisper, we didn't need any more people involved in this.

"I do love you, Ric! I just don't think we should go back in the past. We must have been separated for a reason, so can't we leave it like that!" I had tears pouring out of my eyes now. "We're older now, and it's all too much too soon! Something could happen in the future, but not now. It just doesn't feel right, Ric…" The last few words were less than a whisper. I made a quick exit, as I had done so many times since I had been with Ric again.

I didn't know how I would get through the wedding, especially when the man I had to spend the day with, was the one man that I couldn't stand the sight of right now.

-x-

**A/N: I'm ill people! So if that chapter didn't make much sense, it's because my head is so muddled up right now! Anyway, thank you so much for the reviews you've made, they really help keep me motivated. Sorry that it has been a week since the last chapter, my concentration has left a lot to be desired this week, meaning I could only write five words at a time! Also, my parents believe that ill people do not need to use the computer, and made sure I stayed well away from it :P Please review!**


	19. Chapter 19 The Wedding Part 1

The big day had finally arrived, and Cassie was driving us all insane. I hadn't spoken to Ric since our confrontation two weeks ago, and I was happy to keep it that way now. How stupid had I been to think that I was still in love with him?

It was starting to get to me now, everything. I hadn't been feeling right for a couple of days now, and I had been sick as well. Last night, at the hen night, I didn't drink a thing, I was worried that I would feel bad enough this morning, and I was right.

By the sounds of it Lucas and Ric had made up for the lack of alcohol I had consumed. From my bedroom window, I heard drunken singing and uncontrollable laughing when they got in. Ric was staying here last night, allowing the girls to have some privacy in the morning, and to be here to help Lucas, whereas I had decided to just head over to Cassie's in the morning, I couldn't let her find out about how I was ill.

I dragged my heavy body out of bed and looked at myself in the mirror. My make-up from last night was smudged and my hair was a tangled mess. Underneath my eyes I found wrinkles that proved just how tired I was and my eyes shone with nothing but sadness.

But it was the best day of my two best friend's lives, and I wasn't going to let my own personal problems get in the way of that. Everything was going according to plan so far, Tony left a note on my bedside table, telling me that he was going down to the hotel where the reception was taking place, to help the caterers and florists set up. He really was a proud father. His son was marrying the girl of his dreams, and he couldn't help but smile.

A wave of nausea flew over me and I ran to the bathroom. This was going to be a long day.

-x-

I pulled on my tracksuit bottoms and a scruffy t-shirt, before making my way to Cassie's. When I arrived the room was already filled with stressed out family and friends as well as Mr. Stewart who seemed to be extremely confused by the whole thing.

"Hi Leah, where's the bride?" I asked cheerfully.

"Oh don't ask, there's been a problem with the dress. She's really stressing out. Actually, maybe you could go in and try to calm her down?" Leah spoke breathlessly.

"Sure," I replied before running towards Cassie's bedroom.

-x-

"Look at the dress, Mattie! How am I supposed to get married in this?" Cassie cried.

"Cass, it's just a stain. Sal, can you go and get me some white wine please?"

"Matilda! This is not the time to be drinking," Cassie yelled as Sally ran off to the kitchen. "I have a red wine stain on my dress, help me!"

"It's alright Cass, the white wine should help lift the stain, and then we can use some soda water to get the rest off, okay? Everything's going to be just fine." I replied, soothingly, pulling her into a hug.

-x-

The dress turned out perfectly, and Cassie looked gorgeous. She just radiated beauty, and I was so proud of her. There wasn't a dry eye in the house, and mascara was being re-applied constantly. I was now dressed in my bridesmaid's dress, which seemed a little tighter than it was before, when I was measured three weeks ago, they probably just got the measurements wrong at the shop. My worn out face had been covered in make-up and I felt much better, knowing that I looked better.

Belle had arrived home, looking well rested and relaxed. She said her and Drew had a wonderful time in Mauritius, and they were planning on going back next year. Martha was quite occupied with Christina, who looked so cute in her little summer dress

The doorbell rang and the door opened to reveal Brad, who looked very smart in his suit. He was giving Cassie away at the church, and him and the drivers of the cars that waited outside had come to pick us up.

-x-

I waited nervously behind the doors that would lead me into the church packed with well-wishing people. Cassie was a shaky mess, with Belle trying to calm her down, and Martha was on her way back from feeding Christina one last time before the ceremony started.

I tried to ignore the queasy feeling that lay in my stomach but it was getting harder. Why was I feeling so sick all of a sudden?

"We're here!" Jack shouted as him, Drew and Ric entered the room, all of them looking very smart. I couldn't bear to tear my eyes away from Ric. He looked so handsome in a suit, the turquoise shirt he was wearing brought out the colour in his eyes and the jacket gave him a polished look.

"You ready?" he asked me, flatly.

"Yeah," I replied with a straight face as I picked up my bouquet of flowers.

-x-

We walked swiftly down the aisle, with our arms looped into one. I felt our skin on our hands touch for a brief second and closed my eyes, taking in the moment, remembering how soft his skin felt, like silk and the way it was so perfect, just like him.

Belle and Drew followed, with Jack and Martha closely behind. Tony and Sal stood up at the altar, proudly smiling to themselves.

When we reached them, I was so reluctant to let go of Ric, although I couldn't do it any quicker if I tried.

Then Cassie entered with Brad, and all eyes were on her.

-x-

"Do you, Lucas Anthony Holden, take Cassandra Turner, to be your lawful wedded wife?" the priest asked a glowing Lucas.

"I do," he replied.

"And do you, Cassandra Turner, take Lucas Anthony Holden to be your lawful wedded husband?"

"I do," Cassie replied, tears were in her eyes.

I stood beside Cassie, now holding her bouquet of flowers as well. I couldn't be happier for the both of them; they deserved all of the happiness in the world. I kept exchanging glances with Ric, who stood opposite me. I could tell he was concentrating on something, probably the speech we had to make together later, at the reception. He gave me a sweet smile, something I hadn't seen since our argument, when he caught me looking at him, which I returned, shyly.

-x-

**A/N: I hate to say this, and I never thought I would, but this story is becoming a bit of a chore to write, so I think I'll do a few more chapters to tie everything together and that will be it. I'm going on holiday to Florida for two weeks on the 11th, so I'll try and finish it by then. I've already got the sequel to my one-shot 'Stop Living a Lie' planned out, and I'll probably write it all on the plane! I'm just hoping I will be able to fly, with this whole fiasco that happened at the airport :(**


	20. Chapter 20 The Wedding Part 2

"Please, everyone welcome the Best Man and the Maid of Honour, Mr, Ric Dalby and Miss. Matilda Hunter!" Jack introduced us to everyone at the reception. We entered the room, once again holding onto each other, this time though, we were a bit more relaxed. Jack had told me that he put what he saw to the back of his mind and he was going to keep quiet, I knew I could rely on him.

Ric led me up the stairs to the stage where a microphone was waiting for us to give our speeches, which Luc and Cassie had decided was best done all in one.

"Well, where do I start…" Ric began. "I've known these two for about five years now, and I've loved every second of it. Luc is my best mate, and now my brother-in-law, and Cass is my sister, although she's not always been!" There was a pause as people began to realise what Ric meant. "I can't think of two people who are as perfectly suited for each other than you two. I was planning on writing a huge speech with all of those embarrassing moments that we've been through, but I've decided to spare you the humiliation… for now." Everyone laughed and listened to the rest of Ric's speech intently. Then came the time for mine.

"Like, Ric, I've both known you guys for a long time now, and I couldn't have picked two better best friends, you were always there, through the good times and the bad, the fun and the boring, and I'm so grateful. We both have different histories and memories to carry with us, from the years we spent as four best friends, and now I hope you guys can carry on those memories, as a happily married couple!"

"Now, ladies and gentlemen, if you would please raise your glasses to Mr. And Mrs. Holden!" Ric finished off, grabbing a glass of champagne from the tray a waiter brought beside us. I hesitantly took one as well, although I wasn't planning on drinking it, I was afraid what alcohol would do to my stomach.

-x-

I sat down at the Head Table with Belle and Drew, now with a glass of fresh orange juice. It felt so good to sit down for a while, although the sickness had died down as the day had dragged on."

"You should have seen the beaches, Mattie. They were amazing, even better than here…" Belle rambled on. It wasn't that I wasn't interested in her holiday or anything, but something was starting to dawn on me, something I didn't like one bit.

"Belle! This is my wedding, shouldn't you be talking about something other than yourselves for once!" Cassie exclaimed as she took the seat next to me. Belle and Drew disappeared of onto the dance floor, where the band was in full swing.

"Mattie? Are you okay? You look like you've just seen a ghost," Cassie commented. When I didn't reply and stayed gazing at Ric across the room, Cassie leaned closer to me, with a extremely concerned look spreading over her face. "Tilly, what's up?"

"Oh my God…" I gasped, breathing heavily.

"What? Matilda, you're scaring me now. What's wrong?"

"This is all such a huge mess, Cassie! Why me? What have I ever done to deserve this."

"You're making absolutely no sense, Mattie! Tell me from the beginning."

"I'd rather not," I sighed, the last thing Cassie needed on her wedding day was to be dragged into my warped world.

"I don't care what you would 'rather', just tell me! I won't leave you until you do."

"Fine…" I said, exasperated. "You can't say anything, to anyone though. You understand me? Not even to Lucas." I pointed my finger at her, while gazing out at Lucas who was casually talking to Ric.

"Of course."

"I've been sick the past couple days." Cassie looked confused. "Physically sick, as in vomiting. I've not been that worried though, since I've been under a bit of stress."

"What stress?"

"Oh, nothing really, just stuff left over from Paris," I lied. "Anyway, I also thought that was the reason I was late."

"Late?"

"You know, as in 'late'."

"Oh…" She stopped. "**OH!"**

"Yeah," I nodded. "What if I'm pregnant, Cass?"

-x-

"Now, I'd like to ask the bride and groom to come up and take their first dance as husband and wife. Lucas, Cassie?" Jack asked. Slow music came from the band and Lucas and Cassie became lost in each other's arms as they began to sway lightly to the music.

_I heard there was a secret chord  
That David played and it pleased the Lord  
But you don't really care for music, do you?  
It goes like this, the fourth, the fifth, the minor fall, the major lift, the baffled king composing Hallelujah_

_Hallelujah  
Hallelujah  
Hallelujah  
Hallelu----jah_

_Your faith was strong but you needed proof, you saw her bathing on the roof, her beauty in the moonlight overthrew you  
She tied you to a kitchen chair, she broke your throne, she cut your hair, and from your lips she drew the Hallelujah_

_Hallelujah  
Hallelujah  
Hallelujah  
Hallelu----jah _

-x-

What if I am pregnant? How am I going to tell Ric?

-x-

_Maybe I have been here before, I know this room; I have walked this floor, I used to live alone before I knew you  
I've seen your flag on the marble arch, love is not a victory march, it's a cold and its a broken Hallelujah_

_Hallelujah  
Hallelujah  
Hallelujah  
Hallelu----jah_

_There was a time you let me know what's really going on below, but now you never show it to me, do you?  
Remember when I moved in you; the holy dark was moving too, and every breath we drew was Hallelujah_

_Hallelujah  
Hallelujah  
Hallelujah  
Hallelu----jah _

-x-

I'll take a test as soon as I get home, tonight. I can't let this spoil the party, though.

A baby… I might be having a baby…

-x-

_Maybe there's a God above, and all I ever learned from love was how to shoot at someone who outdrew you  
And its not a cry you can hear at night, its not somebody who's seen the light, its a cold and its a broken Hallelujah_

_Hallelujah  
Hallelujah  
Hallelujah  
Hallelu--jah_

_Hallelujah  
Hallelujah  
Hallelujah  
Hallelu---u---jah_

-x-

**A/N: Okay, I've decided that there will be two more chapters after this and then it's done! It is taking me a lot longer to write the chapters than it used to, and I'm in planning for my next story which is distracting me.**

**Has anyone lese noticed that this story had had 100 reviews! I can't believe it. Thank you so much guys for sticking with me through this. If it wasn't for you, this would still be sitting at the second chapter! Please bear with me now, it should be less than a week until it's completed (woo-hoo!).**


	21. Chapter 21 She's Having A Baby

"Matilda Jane Hunter! Get your lazy backside out of the bathroom right now! People have to leave for their honeymoon in an hour out here!" Robbie sung very irritatingly through the bathroom door.

"Shut up, Rob! I'll be out in a second," I snapped.

"Robbie, just leave it," I heard Cassie say from my bedroom, sounding concerned.

She had offered to postpone the honeymoon so she could be here for me, take me to the doctors and find out, but I refused and managed to persuade her to go, although she made me buy a pregnancy test that could detect the signs of pregnancy just two weeks in, and I should be around about four weeks in, if I was pregnant at all. It cost me a bomb, for such an accurate test, but it was worth it, seeing as Cassie refused to go on her honeymoon if I didn't find out now.

The nausea I had been feeling could just be a bug, as morning sickness usually doesn't occur until about seven weeks into the pregnancy, but as my mum used to tell us, not every pregnancy runs on time, and they are all different.

I stared down at the small piece of plastic that could change my life forever. How could such a small thing have such big consequences? In just fifteen seconds, I would know if I was going to be a mum or not. If Ric was going to be a dad or not.

-x-

Two blue lines.

What did that mean? I checked the box, studying every word as though it had a hidden meaning, leaving no gaps whatsoever.

"One blue line is negative, two blue lines in positive," I read aloud, in a whisper, to myself. It just took a second for my brain to process what I had just read, and when it did, my reaction was to instantly check the test again to make sure I was seeing things.

It was impossible. It couldn't happen to me, could it? The lines were as clear as glass. Two, big, blue lines staring me right back in the face. My future lay before me on the test I held in my hand.

-x-

"Well what's the verdict?" Cassie asked quietly and impatiently in my bedroom.

I tried to reply, but no matter what amount of effort I put into speaking, nothing could urge the words to come out of my mouth. After moments of silence I spoke in a hushed tone.

"I'm pregnant, Cass."

"Oh my God!" she screamed excitedly, only stopping when I put my fingers to my lips to signal for her to be quiet, otherwise everyone would come into the room wondering what the commotion was, and I was not ready to tell anyone other than Cassie yet.

"Please Cass, just shut up."

"I'm sorry, Mattie. Are you going to have to fly back out to France to tell the father or what?"

"Erm… no. He's here, in the Bay."

"Really?" Cassie looked shocked and surprised. "Who is it then?" she asked, eagerly.

"Look, I was going to wait to tell you about this, and then when I found out I was pregnant I told myself I would tell him first, before anyone else, but I suppose with you going away and all I might be able to-" I rambled on, trying to direct her away from this conversation, before she interrupted me.

"Stop stalling! Who is it?"

"It's Ric."

-x-

"Ric? You mean I'm going to be an auntie?" Cassie squealed.

"Yeah, you are. But don't you dare tell him."

"Wait a minute, is that why he and Tessa split up? You're together now? You sounded like you hated each other's guts the other day, what's happening?"

"Ric broke up with Tessa because he slept with me, we had to do the honest thing. The reason why there is so much tension between us is that I can't start our relationship up again, even though Ric's all for it,"

"Why not? You definitely sound like you still love him."

"Why does nobody understand?" I yelled. "I can't get hurt again, especially the way I did before. If Ric and I were meant to be together then I would not feel so much doubt about this. Our relationship is in the past Cassie," I quietened down so I didn't draw attention to our private conversation.

"Yeah but Mattie, this baby is in the future."

With that, Cassie walked out of my room to meet Lucas. Suitcases stood in the hallway, where goodbyes were being said cheerfully. Neither of the happy couple could wipe the grins off their faces, they were blissfully happy.

-x-

"Bye guys!" I waved as the car drove out from the driveway and down the road, before starting to walk to the diner. I had a sudden craving for chocolate cake.

While making my way there, I managed to reflect on my time back in the Bay and the time I had spent with Ric. His intense gaze, the mixture of love and lust lingering in his eyes, his sweet scent, the way he was so protective over me, and the way he was willing to sacrifice everything he had, just to be with me. Of course, once I pluck up enough courage to tell him my news, he'll probably run a mile, no matter what promises he's made in the past. If he is going to be just as scared as I was when I first found out, then it wouldn't surprise me in the least. It's exactly what I would do if I could, but I'm stuck with this baby inside me now, there's nothing I can do.

-x-

"Belle? Back on shift the morning after the wedding?" I asked as I walked into the deserted diner.

"Yeah, it sucks. There's no point in me even being here anyway, there's no customers to be seen," she joked.

"Well you're getting paid for it, that's what it all comes down to."

"Yeah you're right. Have you got any work lined up?" Belle asked, while turning the milkshake machine on.

"No, but I really need to start looking. I always fantasised about going to university after high school, but when I moved away that dream was crushed. Do you know of any jobs going around at the moment?" I asked quickly, thinking about my newfound situation that was causing my mind to think about making a living not just for myself, but also for the little person that would be joining me.

"No sorry, but what you said about university before. You could always start up a course at the local one, just a night course, doing a couple of hours a week. Drew did it and he finished off just a month before you came back. Now he's starting a position as an accountant. It's great!"

"I'll think about it Belle, thanks a million."

"Anytime. Now what can I get you?"

"Just a chocolate cake, please?"

"Coming up!"

-x-

I found myself knocking at the door of the Van Park House, this news was way too big to keep from Ric, even if I was dreading telling him.

"Oh hello, Matilda. What are you doing here?" Sally answered the door. "Did Cassie get off safely?"

"Yeah the plane was due to take off about an hour ago and we haven't heard anything from Lucas so I'm presuming they're in the air now. Anyway, I'm here to see Ric, is he in?" I replied, nervously.

"Sure, he's upstairs playing with Pippa."

"Thanks, Sal," I said as I made my way up the stairs to Pippa's room.

-x-

I was met with the sight of the beautiful seven year old pushing a dolly's pram around her room, and Ric sitting cross-legged on the floor, watching her contentedly.

"Ric, can you take Suzie now? She wants her bottle," Pippa said sweetly while lifting the doll out of the pram gently, and handing it to Ric. "Here's her bottle."

"She's a very good baby, isn't she Pip?" Ric asked, playing his part.

"Of course she is silly!" was Pippa's reply.

I watched silently as Ric cradled the doll, as if it were a real baby, feeding it the bottle gently, with Pippa watching his every move. He fit the part of a dad perfectly, which made the butterflies in my stomach subside for a second, until I saw Ric lay the doll back down in the pram and stand up. That's when I knew it was time for my entrance.

"Mattie!" Pippa squealed delightfully as I walked into the room. She ran up and gave me a huge hug, as if I hadn't seen her in years, even though I had seen her yesterday.

"Hi Pip! Are you having fun playing with Suzie and Ric?" I smirked across the room at Ric, whose horrified expression showed me that he had realised there was an audience watching his performance.

"Yes, Ric is pretending to be Suzie's daddy today," Pippa replied confidently.

"Anyway," Ric drew attention to himself. "What can I do for you Mattie?" he still spoke to me in a different way than he used to, he was still furious at me for not wanting to be with him.

"I need to talk to you, now, Ric." I said, looking at my feet shuffling uncomfortably on the floor.

"Sure follow me," he said as he walked out of Pippa's room and led me into his own.

-x-

"Look Mattie, if this is about you seeing **that** back there, and you know…" Ric said, extremely embarrassed.

"Don't worry Ric, it's nothing to do with my growing concern about your sexuality, that's the least of my problems right now," I sighed trying to make the situation a bit more humourous.

"Fine, but if it's another lecture about how we can't be in a relationship again, then I don't want to hear it. I've had enough of those," he said in a very hostile tone.

"Shut up about that Ric, seriously!" he looked quite taken aback by my snapping at him, but he deserved it, he wouldn't let it go.

"So… is there actually any point to this conversation?"

"Well yeah, there is. You might want to sit down." I took Ric's hand gently in my own and dragged him over to his bed where I sat down, and eventually so did he.

Ric had a very confused look across his face, which just added to my anxiety. How was I supposed to tell him?

"I've not been in here for a while, nothing's changed though I see… still as messy as ever!" I tried to change the subject.

"Yeah, last time you were in here was our last night together, before you left," Ric spoke sadly. I just wanted him to grab me in a hug, holding me tight and tell me everything was going to be okay, actually, just making everything go away altogether.

It was now or never. "Anyway… see the thing is Ric…"

-x-

**A/N: Well that was the penultimate, the last one should be up tomorrow :( Thanks for sticking with me guys, it means a lot! **

**I have two fics in the pipeline now and they should be written up when I come home from my holiday. I think that's the 27th, but don't quote me on that!! One of them is a brand new fic, with a very AU storyline and the other is the sequel to my other fic, 'Stop Living A Lie'.**

**Finally, I'd just like to say how depressing the Aus spoilers sound for the next two weeks, which just happen to be the two weeks I'm in Florida :( I'm hoping everything will be okay but after seeing some magazine scans from TV week, I'm doubting it...**


	22. Chapter 22 The End

"Yeah?" Ric urged me to carry on.

"Erm… I don't really know how to say this…" I stuttered.

"Spit it out, Mattie!" Ric started to get impatient.

"Just let me take my time, okay? This is kind of huge."

"Huh?" Ric's frowned. "What sort of huge? How can-"

"I'm pregnant!" I blurted out, while tightening my already firm grip on his hand.

-x-

I watched as all signs of colour left Ric's face immediately, and he took his hand away from mine, before standing up off the bed and pacing the room, taking in exactly what I had just said.

"Are you sure? I mean, I didn't think you had a boyfriend while you were living in Paris, did you?" he asked quickly.

"No," I shook my head slowly. "And I'm sure, I took another test again this morning, as well as last night. You're the only person I've been 'with', Ric. You're going to be a dad…"

"Seriously?" I couldn't tell if this was good news or bad news for him, his face was blank.

"Yes, Ric. I'm having a baby." I was praying that Ric's delayed reaction was going to be a happy one, but sadly, as I watched him walk from one side of the room to the other, I got the feeling that my prayers weren't going to be answered.

"Oh my God!! I'm going to be a dad!" he screamed, lifting me up in his arms and twirling me around.

-x-

**One Year Later…**

"Honey, Lizzie's crying again…" I spoke sleepily, it was 3am and I wasn't prepared to get up for the sixth time that night.

"I'm already on it," Ric whispered, from our bedroom door.

-x-

Even though I was still half asleep, I walked across the hallway and stood at the doorway of Lizzie's room, watching my husband play with my beautiful baby girl.

"You just wanted your daddy this time, didn't you?" Ric cooed as he cradled our four-month-old daughter in his strong arms.

Lizzie giggled at him and stared up at him her big blue eyes, they were exactly like Ric's and she could get anything she wanted with them.

"Oh look it's mummy," Ric turned around to face me. "Say hi to mummy!" he used his hand to wave her own.

"Hi baby girl!" I walked over and took her from his arms.

"You didn't have to come you know, I can handle my own daughter. She's just like her mum; she gets a bit cranky sometimes. I'm used to it by now," he said smugly.

I playfully hit him with my free arm and he kissed me on the forehead as an apology.

We stood there silently, Ric had his arms around my waist and rested his head on my shoulder as I made sure Lizzie fell back to sleep.

"I don't know how I ever managed to live my life without you guys," he whispered into my ear.

"I don't know how we could ever manage without you," I said back, kissing him on the lips.

"I love you, Matilda Dalby."

"I love you too. We both do," I spoke, smiling down at the baby that had come into our lives.

If it wasn't for her, Ric and I would probably still be in the same position as we were in a year ago. I guess she was our little angel.

We always come back to each other in the end, she just helped us along a bit.

-x-

**A/N:( :( :( :( I'm so sad it's over, it's like the end of an era. I'm actually pretty proud of myself for not abandoning this, as I was sure I would.**

**Once again, thanks to all of my amazing reviewers, you really kept me motiovated with your kind words and opinions.**

**I hope you liked the end, it was a very short chapter but I thought that was how it should be, and it ended on a happy note! I called the baby Elizabeth or 'Lizzie' after Beth in her memory if you hadn't figured that out already. I just wish this would happen on the show lol!**

**So, for the millionth time, thank you guys! You'll be seeing me again very soon... (as soon as I get back from my holidays!)**


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